It began as the GODFATHER OF MATH, evolved into the GOODFATHER OF MATH. Now this. Go figure...


______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
The kind of humor I like is the thing that makes me laugh for five seconds and think for ten minutes = G. CARLIN...Stain glass, engraved glass, frosted glass
–give me plain glass = JOHN FOWLES...Music is the mathematics of the gods = PYTHAGORAS... Nothing is more fluid than language = R. L. SWIHART
I cannot live without the oxygen of laughter = DAWN POWELL + + + But please be sure to season that with the hydrogen of gravitas = PAUL OLIVERIO
______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Monday, July 31, 2017

Finders Keepers But I Am Not My Brother's Keeper

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Find it here
there and everywhere
but not within

Oh Fault
only I am free
of your grasp

Paul Oliverio

________________________________________________________________________________________________
Footnotes
FINDERS KEEPERS
BUT I AM NOT MY BROTHER'S KEEPER
is the copyrighted property of LCSoL.

The last time I wrote
three poems in one day,
I was on a school bus,
wondering about life after high school.
________________________________________________________________________________________________

Turvy And Textbook

________________________________________________________________________________________________
 
Up against the wall
Up against the world
Up against the clock
His reactions
—Topsy, turvy, and textbook—
Made the wall
Look just like him

Paul Oliverio 


________________________________________________________________________________________________
Footnotes
Written less than three hours ago,
TURVY AND TEXTBOOK
is the copyrighted property of
LCSoL.

The last time I wrote
two poems in on day,
I was on a NYC subway,
thinking about life after college. 
________________________________________________________________________________________________


The 79th Bullet: Easy Hard Hardest

________________________________________________________________________________________________


Lust is easy.
Love is hard work
but the labor involved
is small potatoes
compared to
Trust.

________________________________________________________________________________________________
 Footnote
THE 79th BULLET  is the copyrighted property of  LCSoL.

Only the first 45 Bullets are linked together
because we do not want to make life easy
for our favorite thieves.
________________________________________________________________________________________________


She Snores, I Cough, Then Reach for Another Cigaret

________________________________________________________________________________________________

As the world
rolls the dice
and eats breakfast

The worm churns
in the window
pretending to
have wings

As thee dog
licks his bowl
and points
to the door

The wrinkles
stand in line
awaiting soap

Salami is ready
for her skateboard

I need
a cup of coffee

Paul Oliverio 


________________________________________________________________________________________________
Footnote
Written less than three hours ago,
SHE SNORES, I COUGH,
THEN REACH FOR ANOTHER CIGARET
is the copyrighted property of
LCSoL. 
________________________________________________________________________________________________


Sunday, July 30, 2017

A Page So Nice, I Have Now Posted It Thrice

________________________________________________________________________________________________

WHY WE DON'T SAY
PRAISE BE TO JOEY


At the Church of the Solid Cinder
There was no Original Sin
But there was
the Original Twin

So much smaller in stature
With eyes never opened wide
Little Joey Christ was
equally crucified

Except for the Solid Cinder
All scripture is at a loss
Accounting for
the miniature cross

Big Brother Jesus
Got all the press
Little Twin Joey always
made a mess

Present at the Miracle
Of the Loaves  and Fishes
Joey washed all the dishes

Smashing plates while
Turning water into mud
Joey's only words were
Thud Thud Thud

Of Joey's official miracle
History gave no talk
Little Joey Christ made
chocolate into chalk

But no devil is
This Little He
Who only believed
in tomfoolery

As for me,
The scribe I be
May need hide
in a vault

If only
To avoid
Becoming
a pile of salt


________________________________________________________________________________________________
Footnotes
This page is the copyrighted Property of LCSoL.

The original title was
The Original Twin ... #999

The second title was
a/k/a GodFather of Math (p1003) 
________________________________________________________________________________________________


Photoverio © (#262): GSS Security System

________________________________________________________________________________________________


© Oliverio 
Cat Burglars Beware!
________________________________________________________________________________________________


When Life Imitates Art

________________________________________________________________________________________________


On the twentieth of July,
Comedy Central broadcast
an episode of THE PRESIDENT SHOW
 in which the President of the United States
is flattered to be referred to as 
"The Mobster President."

He calls himself THE DON
 and has a private meeting
with three Mafia Goombahs.

On the twenty first of July,
the morning after this broadcast,
the actual President of the United States
appointed Anthony Scaramucci
White House Director of Communications.

If the Mooch is not a Mafia by-product,
then my name is Albert Einstein.

Given the vast reach of 
Saturday Night Live,
The most famous Donald Trump
impersonator is Alec Baldwin.

Baldwin does a great caricature
of the President but on the smaller scale
of Comedy Central,  Anthony Atamanuik 
breathes real life comedy/tragedy
into his portrayal of Donald Trump.

If you watch him for an entire episode
[Thursday Night, 11:30PM],
you will then have a difficult time
enjoying Baldwin doing the same thing.   

________________________________________________________________________________________________
Footnote
The next GoFather/Trump page is
here.
________________________________________________________________________________________________

Photoverio © (#261): A Flawed Photograph

________________________________________________________________________________________________


© Oliverio 
From the Smoker's Nest
Above the Breakers' Sky Room
(7/4/17)
________________________________________________________________________________________________


Photoverio © (#260): Nicky The Gnome

________________________________________________________________________________________________


© Oliverio
Nicky the Gnome is sitting
and waiting but he is not
waiting for Godot.

He is waiting for 
the potted amaryllis
to flower.

If it does not flower,
he may fly away
on his magic broom.

Or me may not.

:::
:::
:::



PS

My better half
inspired this flower 
from that plant
 
________________________________________________________________________________________________


Please Don't Talk To Me Today ... But Google 'Til You Drop

________________________________________________________________________________________________


Unless your name is
Duke Ellington or 
Mozart or Satchmo.

Unless you are the Beatles, Jefferson 
Airplane or Chuck
Berry, I am not 
interested in 
what you have
to say.

I intend to make this an all day headphone affair.

I will take the A-Train up to Strawberry Fields.

Then I will ride on a Surrealistic Pillow with Maybelline.

And end it with a little night music.

What a wonderful world this could be.

If I sing along to what only my ears can hear,
please do your best not to listen.

________________________________________________________________________________________________


Have You Seen Your Mother, Baby, Standing In The Shadows?

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Pork chops, veal cutlets, and London broil were the rule, not the exception, when neither spaghetti nor lasagna were served for dinner. Or five default chicken recipes from Uncle Willy, the Maitre'd at the Waldorf Astoria.

In 1944, he was the best man at my parents' wedding. He was the only German married to an Oliverio. There were seven married Oliverio siblings plus one priest.

Uncle Willy was married to my Godmother, my unforgetable Aunt Kay. He also introduced my father to the restaurant business.

In 1961, Sam Oliverio managed a Long Island country club.

He would routinely order five hundred pounds of prime cut meat and our family lived twelve miles away from the club. 

Fifty pounds of Thank You prime were delivered to our home by the meat salesman.

"My wife," said Sam 
to the salesman
"is jail bait."

Sam said nothing about
his twelve-year-old son.  

My mother and I were
playing Scrabble when 
a strange man walked up
our driveway carrying
two heavy bags.

She walked outside
and I heard a flustering voice
explaining why he was there.

But I had a seven letter word to play.
Infinite was worth 78 points.

And then I walked out onto the patio,
standing next to the woman, who was 
looking at the man standing 
at the bottom of the stairs.

He was still holding the bags,
hoping to be invited up the stairs.

"You're husband was right," he said,
"You are jail bait."

But then he saw a twelve-year-old boy
with the eyes of Don Corleone.

He had said, "You're husband was right."

Then he was full of fright
without my saying
a word.

My eyes did all the talking.

"I'll just leave the bags here."

In a kneeling gesture,
fifty pounds of prime meat
were set down on the ground.

Like a cartoon rabbit,
the salesman turned around
and made a whoosh of an exit. 

I walked down the stairs and
carried the bags to the kitchen.

My mother refrigerated all the meat
then we finished the game of Scrabble.

I had never before heard the expression  
"jail bait" but those were the last two words
my Mother played and she won
the game.

But I got to choose what she would cook for dinner.
We had veal cutlet parmigiana.

Fifty six years after that day,
when I am standing in the shadows,
I can still taste veal cutlets.


________________________________________________________________________________________________
Footnotes
The story is the copyrighted property of LCSoL.

But the title is the soundtrack.
________________________________________________________________________________________________


Thursday, July 27, 2017

Evolution Blues

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Nature made man out of monkey
according to ancient history

But it took a beautiful woman
to make a monkey out of me

She'll give you a sweet talk
and great big hug and squeeze

And before you know it, man 
that woman have you climbing trees

According to scientific history

So it was told to me

It took a thousand years for nature
to make a man out of monkey
But it took a very short time for woman
to make a monkey out of man
You don't need a map of the world
or a blueprint to understand

Cousin Joe

Another page
for this sage
is
here  

________________________________________________________________________________________________


Sunday, July 23, 2017

Please Take Advantage Of My Nostalgic Moment

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Unless the sight of serious algebra
causes serious suicidal thoughts
...
...
  
Once upon a time
I called this
a JBL equation
That is,
you can solve this 
Just By Looking


 The equation has two of everything:

15 appears twice
X appears twice

There are two Plus Signs 
and there are two
square root thingies

The question is
SOLVE FOR  X

Three simple steps
is all it takes.

 ❶ Subtract 1 from 15   [=14]

Take half of that result  [=7] 

Multiply it by itself [= 49]
    
Therefore
X = 49

...
...


Regardless of what
the number is
(as long as it is an odd #)
do the same three steps:

IF
all things were the same
but the number = 11
[instead of 15]
THEN
11 ⇛ 10 ⇛ 5 ⇛ 25


________________________________________________________________________________________________
Footnote
This is the rarest of pages
where the dark (or red) print
does not indicate a hyperlink.
________________________________________________________________________________________________

Saturday, July 22, 2017

Black Music

________________________________________________________________________________________________





I would never have believed
anyone who told me that
Someday, you will listen
to music in alphabetical order



But that is what I do



If asked five times,
Which of these 
is your favorite song
I could sincerely give
five different answers


However, were I required—at gunpoint—to single out
one track to share with anyone not named Paul Oliverio,
it would be  Joyce Green's BLACK CADILLAC   
________________________________________________________________________________________________


Photoverio © (#259): Midnight Blurificence

________________________________________________________________________________________________


© Oliverio

Connect the dots
(7/4/17) 
________________________________________________________________________________________________


Wednesday, July 19, 2017

President Macron Presents Missing Link To The Frogs

________________________________________________________________________________________________


And the Frogs respond with languid applause
________________________________________________________________________________________________
Footnote
In deference to Ms. Missing Link,
all hyperlinks on this page
are also missing
________________________________________________________________________________________________

No Parking Edict w/Qualifier ... [ pST #20]

________________________________________________________________________________________________


© Mrs. CarPeo
Preferably in the Chair


The next 
Superimposed Text page
is
TBD


The p in the title
stands for
photoverio
________________________________________________________________________________________________


Tuesday, July 18, 2017

Why The GOP Does Not Have GOD On Their Side

________________________________________________________________________________________________


Just six months ago, it looked like
the Republican Party was about to go
on a legislative blitzkrieg, shredding law
after law passed by the Obama administration...
The GOP hadn't held total power in American politics
since 2006, and the party had become much more
conservative in the interim.

And instead of George W. Bush...
the new Congress would work
with a sub-literate tabula rasa named Donald Trump,
a man who could probably be persuaded
to inject himself with experimental medication
if an important-seeming person
whispered "do it" in his ear.

But a funny thing happened
on the way to libertarian utopia.
      
________________________________________________________________________________________________
Footnote
The next GoFather/Trump page is
here. 
________________________________________________________________________________________________

Monday, July 17, 2017

Photoverio © (#258): Ninety Thumbnails Including Paul @ Age 5

________________________________________________________________________________________________


© Oliverio
(2005-2007)
________________________________________________________________________________________________


Sunday, July 16, 2017

A Dawning Of Realization About Social Status #2

________________________________________________________________________________________________


Miss Lesley was unfailingly
considerate of her inferiors
not because of a warm
democratic heart but 
because to be less so 
would be a concession
of their equality.

A Cage For Lovers
(1953)
 
________________________________________________________________________________________________



Saturday, July 15, 2017

A Dawning Of Realization About Social Status #1

________________________________________________________________________________________________


Poverty's precepts are
only good for poverty,
to be thrown away
like darning needles
when you get a dozen
new pair of socks.

A Cage For Lovers
 
________________________________________________________________________________________________
Footnotes
Unfortunately, this book is out of print.

But it behooves me to include another quote
from the third paragraph of the novel:

She would not concede that the desire for freedom,
even freedom from kindness, was a crime.

The next Dawn Powell page is  here.     
________________________________________________________________________________________________


Friday, July 14, 2017

News Flash: Shocking Development In Eternal Paradise

________________________________________________________________________________________________

From


The Rishi
is the alter ego
of
Swami Givabukortu 

________________________________________________________________________________________________


The Face That Filled The Sky

________________________________________________________________________________________________


Positively on 4th Street
________________________________________________________________________________________________


Wednesday, July 12, 2017

Hypothetically ...

________________________________________________________________________________________________

You love your father 
but he is intoxicated with bravado. 

He has a mouth that will not
stop moving and always detours
when it approaches anything
resembling the truth.

He and he alone
knows the name
of the mastermind
behind the JFK assassination.

He told the story
at least ten times
and at least nine times,
the name changed.

It was a guy named Barry.
A high class hooker named Henrietta.
A midget with a limp 
who called himself
Clark Gable
or
Guido, the Governor of Guam
...
   
Everyone else in the family
laughs behind his back
but kowtows to his face
because Daddy is wealthy,
in an elephantine way.

It would be stupid
to get written out
of his will.

For every dollar he saved,
he added another digit.

At the age of eight,
he saved $10 then $200
and then $3000
but only had $3
in the bank.

But now,
he was a bona fide billionaire.
He measured his wealth
—and ego—
with one billion digits.  

Everyone laughed at him
except you:
the one he named
after himself.

He has secretly given you
"allowances" that will guarantee
you never need to do
an honest day's work.

(Despite the fact that,
within your family
honesty is
an alien concept.)

Yet you genuinely
love the old goat
because there was never
a day or an hour
or a minute
when he did not 
have time
for Junior.

Secret time
for Junior
but no secret time
for any of your 
seven siblings
or the four mothers
who birthed them.

The one who isn't
your mother 
is the only one
who hasn't seduced you
or vice versa.

When laughter resonates
from your social circles
because of something
your father said or did,
an arrow pierces your heart.

You get violent and arrested
but of course, Daddy knows
whose palms to grease
and all records
of your arrest
disappear.

When the same laughter
resonates within the social circles
of your seven siblings,
that laughter gets multiplied
by those seven siblings.

That you have genuine feelings
about your father 
or about anything 
separates you from
all of the siblings.

It also separates you
from all of their mothers.

Finally,
for your twenty-eighth birthday,
you get yourself a megaphone,
wrapped in aluminum foil.

At your birthday party,
with fifty members
of your family present
—including too many cute cousins—
your father, as always, was motor-mouthing.

His gobblydegook
drowned out all present
except for the only one
who bears the exact same name.

You shout into the megaphone
Shut the F**k up,
Daddy Dearest.

And he did exactly that.
Never again did he speak
above a whisper.

Never again did he speak
anything that was fabricated.

Never again did your siblings
ignore honest or genuine feelings.

The same is true
for the mothers
who begat them.

Never again does your father
lie, cheat or steal or inspire
behind his back
hilarity.

All because you did
what any genuine son
would do for a genuinely
crazy father.

...

Not now, not in 2020
nor 2024 nor 2028
but at a later date,
if you decide to seek
the highest office
in this land
you will get
my vote.
              
________________________________________________________________________________________________
Footnotes
To believe that the revelations of Donald Trump Jr.
are indefensible is to admit having zero understanding
about family dynamics.

The next  GoFather/Trump page is
here 
________________________________________________________________________________________________


Hall & Oates At The Museum Of Latin American Art

________________________________________________________________________________________________


Javier Marin

Your Kiss is on my List

On exhibit at 
MOLAA 
through
September 3

Also featured: 
Beatriz Kohn's  
Afrodita   
________________________________________________________________________________________________


Tuesday, July 11, 2017

CarPeo Set Piece ... [#69] ... This Is A Stick-Up

________________________________________________________________________________________________


© Mrs. CarPeo

Buds up! Give me all your scents.



The next
CarPeo Set Piece
is
here
________________________________________________________________________________________________


CarPeo Set Piece ... [#68] ... Milk Is ...

________________________________________________________________________________________________


© Mrs. CarPeo

'Tis a tasty brew ... Milk is!

The next
CarPeo Set Piece
is
here 
________________________________________________________________________________________________


I Do Not Believe Any Word From The WP... All The Son Did Was ... Exactly What His FATHER Wanted Him To Do ... Because of $$$

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Last week,
Donald Trump returned
with dollars signs floating
over his head.
Then the signs
disappeared
in a cloud
of nuclear dust.
********************************


********************************
Those dollar signs were generated
by the fantasy of meeting
with all heads of state
as a private citizen
and successful
business
executive.

But he was in their presence
as the most unqualified President
this country has ever had.

Not only did he not
make any money
from G20,
he was treated
like a second class citizen
who happens to be
a world leader.

He might as well
have been wearing
a leper's bell.

I HAVE TO GET OUT OF THIS JOB!
thought President Trump
BUT NO ONE CAN TAKE ME DOWN
UNLESS HIS NAME IS
DONALD TRUMP 
proclaimed President Trump
who then exclaimed

Where the hell
is my son
with my name?

President Trump will now proceed to
MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN   
by allowing 
the Impeachment Proceedings
to get peachy 


________________________________________________________________________________________________
Footnote
The next  GoFather/Trump page is
here
________________________________________________________________________________________________


What A Little Job Promotion Can Do

________________________________________________________________________________________________

He dressed better, he looked better,
and he felt better.

No more soiled tee shirts
with four days growth.

No more suicidal thoughts for a life
lived without a past, present
or future.

It is amazing what a job promotion will do.

Vito Fargo, his boss at Cosmic Beef Grinders,
promoted Anthony Wirdliss to Head Shoplifter,
Walmart Division.

Chop Meat results from slabs of beef
squeezed through a grinding machine.

But Cosmic Beef was merchandise
that Vito Fargo's  "butcher shop"
converted into cold cash.

Anthony Wirdliss was a reluctant employee
who could only heist packs of gum, 
and pairs of avocados.

He never shoplifted anything bigger than
a box of Kellogg's Corn Flakes.

But then he dreamt about reading a book
entitled  The Shoplifter's Guide to Walmart.

He awoke from the dream
and drank a cup
of tea.

He went back to sleep
and the dream resumed.

Specifically, he read a chapter
about "entertainment centers."


His rags turned to riches when he presented
Vito Fargo with a Samsung 55"
QLED 4K plasma television.

Two days later, Anthony lifted a  Samsung 65"
and a Sony 75" TV with high dynamic range!

The new Head Shoplifter repeated
this trifecta seven times in as many Alabama 
Walmart Superstores.

And then Anthony Wirdless remembered:
he hadn't talked to his mother
for seven years.

His mother had been living happily
in a retirement community
in central Florida.

She was living happily
partly because, for seven years,
she never heard from
her ne'er-do-well son.

But now, he was driving to Florida
in a brand new Honda, courtesy
of Vito Fargo.

He and his mother
spent four days
at Disneyworld.

Neither could have been happier.

But Anthony Wirdless
had a fantasy:

He was going to get 
everyone in his mother's
retirement community
a brand new Amana refrigerator.

And it would not cost him
one cent.   

________________________________________________________________________________________________
Footnote
WHAT A LITTLE JOB PROMOTION CAN DO
is the copyrighted property of LCSoL.
________________________________________________________________________________________________


But Where Is Chapter 2? (Comic Relief #1811)

________________________________________________________________________________________________


Charles Barsotti

But the title
refers to
this.
________________________________________________________________________________________________