I Am Teaching Myself How NOT To Be A Liar

________________________________________________________________________________________________

If I were to say
either...

A) I will quit smoking 

next week.

B) I will quit smoking

as a New Year's resolution.

C) I will quit smoking.

Then...

If what I say is choice A ...
and I do not quit smoking next week,
then I am a liar.

If what I say is choice B ...
and come next January 1,
I am still smoking,
then I am a liar.
 
However,
if what I say is choice C ...
and I do not quit smoking
within a year,
I am not  a liar
because I did not specify
when I would quit
smoking.

________________________________________________________________________________________________

A Nonsensical Nonsence Poem

________________________________________________________________________________________________

The nonsense splattered

across the room

Verbs, nouns, adjectives

went to neutral corners

assessing the absurdity

the syllables

the syllabus

the silly bull

and all other

parts of speech

Verbs, nouns, adjectives

went to neutral corners,

kowtowing to each other

in proper order

Then everything

made sense

© Paul Oliverio ©

________________________________________________________________________________________________

The Reason Why MAD Magazine Is Must-Reading

________________________________________________________________________________________________

"But I don't want to go
 among mad people,"
 Alice remarked.

"Oh, you can't help that,"
  said the Cat:
"we're all mad here.
  I'm mad. You're mad."

"How do you know I'm mad,"
  asked Alice.

"You must be,"
  said the Cat,
"or you wouldn't have come here."


  Lewis Carroll 
  Alice In Wonderland

Illustration by

John Tenniel

________________________________________________________________________________________________ Footnote 
But is this possibly the reason why
Alfred E. Neuman has never been portrayed as Alice in Wonderland ?
________________________________________________________________________________________________

STREET ART UTOPIA (#33): Let It Rain

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Chris Wiedmann

The next

Street Art Utopia

page is
here

________________________________________________________________________________________________

From The Long Beach Jetty Parking Lot ... [ pST #26]

________________________________________________________________________________________________

© Oliverio
On the Rock

The next 

Superimposed Text page

is
here 

The p in the title

stands for

photoverio

________________________________________________________________________________________________

If Your Name Is Reed, Please Read ... Even If You Are NOT Reed

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Whistle while you swim

if your name is Jim

If your name is Pam

don't swim while

eating ham

Are you Jack or Jill?
back stroke

for healthy
thrill

If your name is paul

swim the stroke
of crawl

If no one's in the pool

(because air is too cool)

and you are a duck

then you are in luck

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Footnote
IF YOUR NAME IS REED, PLEASE READ...
is the copyrighted property of LCSoL.

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Felini Photograph ... sic ... [ pST #25]

________________________________________________________________________________________________

© Oliverio

Bullish

The next 

Superimposed Text page

is
here

The p in the title

stands for

photoverio

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Images of A Muse ... With Two Poems By Her Husband

________________________________________________________________________________________________

The Muse =  Nunsch Eluard

The Poet =    Paul Eluard

 

**********

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Quoting The Creator Of The Comic Strip Calvin And Hobbes

________________________________________________________________________________________________

We don't devote

enough scientific research

to finding a cure

for jerks.

Bill Watterson 

________________________________________________________________________________________________

No Shortage Of Brilliant Moments In LILY TOMLIN's Career

________________________________________________________________________________________________

BUT

...

This one stands out

because it is so brief

and so evanescent

From the greatest
network police drama,
Homicide. 
It has been off
the air for more than
ten years but it gave birth
to THE WIRE
and whatever show
features a character
named "Munsch"

This video is prefaced
by an advert but
Lily makes it
worth the wait
 

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

A Story Begins ... And Hopefully Will Be Completed

________________________________________________________________________________________________

He said,

Only one more,

then boarded the train

to Phoenix.

He sat down,

admiring the view

that sped by.

On his lap,

he opened his attache case

and repeated the words

Only one more 

Only one more sale

and then he could go sailing.

He looked at the open

attache case and saw 

a magic carpet

Upon which,

he was soon to ride.

Then he opened his eyes.

TBC

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Hello, Lenore Plantaviscus ... You Wonderful Wandering Wallflower

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Dark limb ends in green
with valor

Gray limb is without end

without color

She grows on

our patio

And I'll

have you know

There is 

a curiosity game

 

A neighbor asked

What is plant's name?

She was quite demure

I said...

We call her LENORE

  

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Footnote

Poem and image are the copyrighted property

of Lewis Carroll School of Logic.

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Photoverio #271: A View Of Cal State University At Long Beach

________________________________________________________________________________________________

© Oliverio 
Vertically Yours

Outdoor exhibit at
University Art Museum

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Meet Donald Trump's Favorite Athletes

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Trump Invites
Russian National
Basketball Team
to White House

"You ask anyone who knows,
Steph Curry is nowhere near
as good as Vladimir Ivlev,"
Trump said



From the
Borowitz Report

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Footnote
The next GoFather/Trump page is  here

________________________________________________________________________________________________

From A Poet Who Is Exactly 121 Years Old + One Day

________________________________________________________________________________________________

There was a girl in the caboose

She might be

the brakeman's wife

She might be

a tramp

Happy under a spell of

the wider and wider night

A silhouette and outline

...

Something finished

white, polite, unpolished

It was a destiny

scarred a little with

young wars

Worried with

old white faiths

F. Scott Fitzgerald

Segmented with re-format
from a story
entitled
Travel Together 

Another quote
from this story is
here 

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Schoolboy Name-Calling ... Planet Earth Elementary

________________________________________________________________________________________________

   

There is a dispute

between two boys:

X is the captain

of the football team

and

Y is the only member

of the ping-pong
solitaire club

X and Y have an encounter

in the schoolyard:

X calls Y "Rocket Man"

Y calls X "Dotard"

Mr. Merkel has the  the boys
report to the principal's office

He says, "Really now, X,

What did you call Y?"

"Rocket Man"

"Really now, Y,

What did you call X?"

"Dotard"

Mr. Merkel gives

Y gets 20 bonus points

and a recipe for Schnitzel

Mr. Merkel then laughs at X

who must stay after school,

erase every chalkboard

and then clean all the erasers.

Three hours later,

with chalk dust all over his clothes,

X gets the last laugh:

He steals all the erasers

and never returns to school

but he is convinced that

Y's mother

wears combat boots.

Y

however,

before graduating with honors,

is convinced

X's mother's son

wears stilleto heals.

THE END

(We hope!) 

The next
GoFather/Trump 
page is
here  

________________________________________________________________________________________________

You Never Know What You Didn't Know Until...

________________________________________________________________________________________________

I knew that  one of her books

was hand-delivered to

Pope John Paul II.

I knew that another

of  Mrs. CarPeo's books

was hand-delivered to

the Academy Awards organizers.

But what I did not know

until I saw this image

is that Mrs. CarPeo

once rode in a motorcade

with

Richard Nixon 

Or so it seems!

________________________________________________________________________________________________

CarPeo Set Piece #75 ... Dylan Thinking About Italian Deli Lyrics

________________________________________________________________________________________________ 

I gotta mozzarella ball
in my mouth
I'm gonna swallow
it'll go south

I wanta salami sandwich
it'll hit the mark
fill it up as if
it were Genoa's Ark

Then I'll set sail—
that's no baloney—
after a golden cup
of  Gazelle's Tortoni

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Footnotes

Mrs. CarPeo is responsible for title

and photograph.

But her lesser half is responsible

for the suggested lyrics.

Image is shadow of Dylan
with a chinectomy.

The next
CarPeo Set Piece
is 
 here  

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Seventeen Words About Words From FSF On His 121st Birthday

________________________________________________________________________________________________

You don't write

because you want to

say something,

you write 

because you have

something to say.

F. Scott Fitzgerald 

 Born: September 24,1896

Died: December 21, 1940

The next Fitzgerald page

is

here 

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Laughter Died Four Days Before The Tenth Anniversary Of 9/11

________________________________________________________________________________________________

This is not a fun fact.

It is

the verifiable truth.

________________________________________________________________________________________________

A Tribute Page For Another Bronx-Born Italian: Jake Lamotta

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Though they were born in the same year,

Jake LaMotta outlived my Mother

by forty-six years.

Though they were born in

the same borough of New York,

my Mother's only son will outlive 

Jake Lamotta for at least

one more day.

The "Bronx Bull" is pictured below

with his wife Vicki:

But Jake Lamotta did not become
famous as a family man.

He was a professional boxer
with a career record
of 86 wins, 19 losses,
and 4 draws.

 Losing nineteen bouts
does not a legend make.

Jake Lamotta fought
Sugar Ray Robinson
six times,
losing five times.

Lamotta's last professional fight
was in 1954. 

In 1980,
Jake became a household name
as a result of a movie
about his life.

Raging Bull,
according to better minds
than my own, is
the greatest boxing film
of all-time.

Directed by Martin Scorcese,
it starred Robert Deniro
as Jake Lamotta.

Raging Bull introduced
Joe Pesci and Cathy Moriarty
to the silver screen.

They portrayed Jake's brother
and the wife with whom
Jake had a tormented
relationship.

The real Jake Lamotta
had seven wives
but only Vicki
(his second wife)
is featured throughout
the film.

As a result of the movie,
the real Vicki Lamotta
posed in Playboy
at the age of fifty. 

Raging Bull
gave birth to the acronym
TGIWFIBAWANC

Thank God It Was Filmed
In Black And White
And Not Color

In Hollywood,
Raging Bull cemented
the names
Scorcese and DeNiro
together and has 
slathered them with
1001 superlatives.

The greatest little treasure
of  Raging Bull,
however,
involves another
Italian/American:

Most famous as "Coach"
—the lovable/gullible bartender—
in the TV Series CHEERS,
Nicholas Colasanto
goes 180 degrees
in Raging Bull.

Colasanto played the part
of a menacing, influential
mobster responsible for
the darkest moment
in the boxing career
of Jake Lamotta

***

The real
Jake Lamotta 
died yesterday
at the age of ninety-five

 I will close this page
with a quote
from the cinematic
Jake Lamotta:
Rest in peace, Champ 

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Please Don't Get Me Wrong About Jane Fonda

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Unlike the allegedly legitimate media,
I  criticized Jane Fonda's flagrant
mispronunciation of

an important word on 
the 2017 Emmys

But don't get me wrong:
I respect her talents
immensely

Jane won two Academy Awards

and has had a stellar career

as an actress

Great debate would ensue
if you tried to name
her best film

However,
there is little debate
about which of Jane Fonda movies
had the most enticing
opening credits.

That would be her third film,
made in 1962.

It was entitled
Walk On The Wild Side

________________________________________________________________________________________________

2017 A.D. Does NOT Refer To The Year

________________________________________________________________________________________________

This excerpt
is from an essay entitled
Sex sells—
but Fear and Anxiety sell more

The italicized initials
in the title of this page
represent what the news media
—be it print, TV, radio, or internet—
does on any given day:
There are, a minimum of 
2017 Anxieties Dispensed   

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Footnotes
This page echoes a quote from
the late, great journalist
Eric Sevareid

(1912-1992)

For longer than a decade,
Mr. Sevareid
was the news analyst on
CBS News with Walter Cronkite  

________________________________________________________________________________________________

The Guy Who Said GOD IS DEAD Also Said...

________________________________________________________________________________________________

There are no higher men, we are all equal,

man is man, before God we are all equal.

Friedrich Nietzsche

Thus Spake Zarathustra

The quote is from p.222
of the above hyperlink

In the words of
Zeke Theismor de Oposito:
"The quote may be out of context
but no philosopher
speaks with only
one tongue."  

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Footnote
Nietzsche  also said
"I myself  have pronounced my laughter holy."

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Her Emmyness Speaketh: Jane Fonda's Covfefe Moment

________________________________________________________________________________________________

On last night's Donald Trump Roast

that doubled as
an award dispensary

...

Jane Fonda coigned a new word:

Egotizzical

But the text accompanying 

that hyperlink

fails to acknowledge

her "covfefe" moment

People in covfefe houses
shouldn't throw covfefe

However, 
Ms. Fonda,
pictured here with 
9 to 5  co-stars
Lily Tomlin and Dolly Parton,
pronounced her words correctly
in 1980.

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Footnotes
Jane Fonda's creative pronunciation
occurs at the :52 mark
of the :72 video.

But an appreciation
of her film history
can be found
here.

An appreciation
of Lily Tomlin
can be found
there.

The italic caption is a quote from Hillary Clinton.

You may now google at your own risk
BUT

The next GoFather/Trump page
is
one click from here.

________________________________________________________________________________________________

How Donald Trump Made American Comedy Great Again

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Jokes come from a place

of pulling your hair out

seeing things that make you cringe

and wanting to make that into

something that will make you laugh.

Jon Stewart 

Quote is from
page 4 of
this book 

The next
GoFather/Trump page
is
here 

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Ground Zero For The Number Zero

________________________________________________________________________________________________

New carbon dating research commissioned
by the University of Oxford into
the ancient Indian Bakhshali manuscript
has revealed it to be hundreds of years older
than initially thought, making it
the world’s oldest recorded origin
of the zero symbol that we use today. 

© Art Daily
9/15/17

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Footnote
The Oxford researcher was asked
"How did you know you discovered
the origin of Zero?"
He replied
"There was nothing to it."

😉________________________________________________________________________________________________

The 81st Bullet: It's All In The Telling

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Ask people what they think
and they will tell you.
Tell people what to think
and they will.

________________________________________________________________________________________________

 Footnotes

THE 81th BULLET  is the copyrighted property of  LCSoL.

Only the first 45 Bullets are linked together
because we do not want to make life easy
for our favorite thieves.
________________________________________________________________________________________________

Photoverio #270: Aerial View Of Palm And Pond

________________________________________________________________________________________________

© Oliverios
                                              
 Comerica Plaza
90802

________________________________________________________________________________________________