Thursday, April 30, 2015

........................................... Jack Ely, R.I.P. ..........................................

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 Louie Louie Singer  Jack Ely  Dies in Oregon at Age 71

Jack Ely, co-founder of the early 60's band The Kingsmen
 and best known for his 1963 rendition of the song  "Louie Louie,"
plays his Fender bass guitar at his home
 in Terre Bonne, Ore. on April 16, 2009.

 Ely has died after a long battle with an illness,
 his son, Sean Ely, confirmed Tuesday, April 28, 2015.

 Rest In Peace, Jack  
 Give a CarPeo hug to Richard
Then Heaven will dance 
to your version of
Louie Louie

 
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Wednesday, April 29, 2015

This Page Is Dedicated To Dr. Oz

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Mehmet Oz
a/k/a Dr. Oz
10,000 doctors say... 
 




People  need  
  
communication  skills 

to  offset  their

infinitely superior

miscommunication skills.
  
Masters of the former often have a graduate  degree  in  Scamology  but  masterfully  miscommunicate this fact.


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Footnotes
The text on this page is the copyrighted property of LCSoL.

The image is from the land of Oz.

Had the page been written two months ago,
it would have been dedicated to  Brian Williams.
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MAD Magazine Loves Havrilesky and Metcalf

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Ms.  Havrilesky  and Ms.  Metcalf  are the artists 
responsible for all you really need to know about




To Be Continued

Sunday's broadcast episode ended with the proclamation
"There are only two more episodes until the grand finale"
of the seventh season of MAD MEN.

Meanwhile...
MAD MAGAZINE  is in its seventh decade
of  TV and Film Parodies.
But whose counting?
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Meanwhile, In Berlin...A Dysfunctional Family Convenes

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This sculpture by  Issac Cordal  in Berlin is called
Politicians Discussing Global Warming
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The CarPeo DYSFUNCTIO CACTUS GARDEN (Exhibit B)

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Moby Cacti
is a scary sight
but delete all response
that results in fright

His domain 
is the Pacific Rim
but all the water
is inside of him

Moby Cacti
you need not fear
he is naught but 
a super-sized prickly pear.




©

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Footnotes
All DYSFUNCTIO CACTUS GARDEN images and captions
are the copyrighted property of LcSoL.

Your admission ticket, when presented to the Aloween Gift Shop,
will get you a free Moby Cacti PP lollipop.

Prickly pear lollipops are sometimes used 
as a weight loss aid to treat obesity. 

The Dysfunctio Cactus continues  here.
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The CarPeo DYSFUNCTION CACTUS GARDEN (Exhibit A)

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©©©          I am so lonely          ©©©
the  cactus did cry
his outer shell
is so so so dry

Through that there fence
he cannot move
his hide is rough
and never smoove

But he is pulped 
with inner space
thus explaining
 the smile 
on his face 

 



©

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©














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Footnotes
All DYSFUNCTIO CACTUS GARDEN images and captions
are the copyrighted property of LcSoL.

In the Aloween Gift Shop of the DYSFUNCTIO CACTUS GARDEN,
the following information is available:

In modern holistic medicine, prickly pear cactus extract and supplements 
are used to treat type 2 diabetes, high cholesterol, colitis, diarrhea 
and benign enlargement of the prostate gland. 

Prickly pear lollipops are sometimes used as a weight loss aid to treat obesity. 
The natural extract is a useful remedy for alcohol hangovers, and the plant's 
gel-like sap is often used as a hair conditioner. 

The male half of the CarPeo family prefers to think of holistic medicine
as nightmare juice for Big Pharma.

Exhibit B is  here. 
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Tuesday, April 28, 2015

Appearance Is Everything (Comic Relief # 328 )

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Lee Lorenz
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Sunday, April 26, 2015

Cardinal Haze, The Deck Deacon

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© Mrs. Oliverio
Wish You Were Here
From his patio pulpit,
Cardinal Haze
A/k/a  Rednek
preaches to
the Heinz
congregation

All the foods
stand straight
on the table
praying for
salt and pepper.



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She Dreams Of Reverso Zooso

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The lion in a loincloth
with name tag and huge smile

His mane is jherry-curled
 his finger is pointing

It looks like a finger
but it is a paw

The cage he guards is 
Levittown

A family of four sits around 
a dinner table

Nobody talks 
everybody is chewing

Steak, potatoes, 
vegetables
without identity.

Four humans, nobody 
leaves the table

Nobody talks
everybody is chewing

***

An eagle with
an X on his chest

legs spread in front 
of a red tent

The eagle looks

With an  X
instead of 
wife-beater
t-shirt

X-rated cage
is his lure

Man and woman
intercoursing

Moaning
groaning

She, faking
orgasm, he
is on top of 
the world

Their world
measures
12' x 12' x 12'

Welcome to
the reverse zoo

Elementary age
children are all
on exhibit

In the bird cages.

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Footnotes
SHE DREAMS OF REVERSO ZOOSO  is the copyrighted property of LCSoL.

Presently, it is the sleepful landscape of Mrs. CarPeo, who is the hero
of the Executive Mouse Foundation of Katonah, NY
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How Much Is That Renzo Piano Fee In The Window?

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A design collaboratively put together by Art students at  CSULB 
would have achieved the same–if not better–
results than what you see below

Whitney Museum of American Art

How big is the news for supporters of the Whitney
to credit a world-famous architect for the new look?

How small and embarrassing for supporters of the Whitney
if they had to give credit to a bunch of California students?

But the biggest and most undeniably measurable news
would be for the Whitney's budget controller.
Instead of paying $10 million dollars to a five-star architect,
it would cost $10 thousand dollars for the fifth-ranked
state university art school in the United States.

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Footnotes
The actual Piano bill of cost for the re-building of the Whitney Museum  was $422 Million.

Dollar-for-dollar in the United States,  it would be impossible to find a better Art School
than what is on the campus of  California State University at Long Beach.

The AFP photograph was taken by  D. Dipasupil.
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A Question From Julian Barnes (If Under Thirty: Not For You!)

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Were you as young as you felt 
or as old as you looked?
Mr. Barnes asks the question
 in  his anthology, 
 The Lemon Table.

The next Julian Barnes page 
is  here. 













The answer is as simple as the question.

You are what you are 
except when you are not.
The answer was formulated
at an LCSoL executive retreat
featuring this Oliverio assemblage.
















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1966 Photograph + 2015 Poem = This Page

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I promised Mrs. CarPeo I would neither 
reveal authorship of the poem
nor doctor the photo. 
 Oh my!
 What would you say
 as I passed by!
 Caption balloons
 Are heavy in the air
"look at my toes"
"I have quite a pair"
"look at my hair,
 shining here"
 Look at his shirt
 with its theatrical
 Nonchalant wear.
 Oh my!
 The boys
 Don't care!

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Most-Modern Picasso

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I know what you are thinking.

You've been to a handful of Picasso exhibits.
You've read books about Pablo
and have enough familiarity
with his work to declare:
This is not a Picasso!

But you would be wrong.

However, were you to be more specific:
This is not a Pablo Picasso!

You would not be wrong.

It is the work of  Juan Antonio Picasso,
a Cuban artist who is actually related to Pablo.
Whatever measure of fame we can use for the latter,
that same measure describes the anonymity of the former.

























Undoubtedly, Pablo would be very proud of  Juan Antonio.
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Saturday, April 25, 2015

..........???...........Updating The Viet Nam Memorial.........???............

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I was on the phone, calling San Diego from Washington D.C.
I was paging through  a directory.
"B-A-Y-E-S, Thomas," he said.
"I found him, Ray, I said,
"I'll send you the photograph as soon as I can."

  

When I visited the VietNam Memorial Wall in 2004,
there were obvious reasons Ray Peterssen's name
was not listed: he was alive and well,
living in La Jolla.

When he played guitar, all I could think of
was manna from heaven.

He started playing guitar when he was eight years old.
Five years later–1963–we became friends
and would remain so until his death
on February 19, 2012.

That was the same day the GODFATHER OF MATH was born.

Ray looks great in this 2008 portrait he had done
to promote his recording studio, Raining Notes.




But, two years later, Ray's stomach looked as if
it had swallowed that guitar.

It distended obscenely as a result of something
that sounds as if it could have been a candy bar:

It was actually a delayed reaction 
to our biochemical warfare in VietNam.

Raymond Peterssen was a VietNam casualty.
The war ended officially in 1975.
But Agent Orange, which the United States 
sprayed "millions of gallons" all over VietNam, 
can take a long, long time
to do its final damage.

Ray's life ended officially in 2012.

In no way was my best friend unique 
in being a belated war casualty.

However, I asked a VietNam veteran, 
if anyone kept a record
of these slow death casualties.

"Of course there is a record of such deaths."

"Where is it?"

"It's in the Veteran's Administration."

Of course that means the public is kept oblivious 
of the reason there needs to be an extension 
of the VietNam wall.

Unless you want to believe the news media 
that praises itself for courageous investigations 
is capable of exposing the true 
and lasting value of Agent Orange.

Maybe if  Dow Chemical,  its manufacturer,
hadn't made a billion dollars profit from Agent Orange,
a journalist would be willing to come forward
and enlighten America.*

Dow Chemical also manufactures napalm.

We cursed (and then bombed) Saddam Hussein 
for using deadly chemicals on his own people
but it was the United States that had been doing
the same damn thing.

The difference being that USA is much better at it.

Our government never sprayed Agent Orange
within the geographical boundaries of 
the United States.

Also, the profit margin on Agent Orange–
and all the descendents of World War I's mustard gas–
is such a delight for chemical manufacturers
and their stockholders.

*But  someone  may be proving me wrong. 


A photograph of Raymond Peterssen
appears at the absolute bottom
of every GoFather of Math page.

Lo and behold, 
Mrs. CarPeo found a second–
and much more visible–essay
on this subject.

Thank you,  Christopher Hutchins.
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See No, Be No, But Get The Grant Granted

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See no evil, Be no evil,  Research all evil

























Infinity is an approximate measure
of my gratitude to this
astounding website.

TIME Magazine repeatedly ranks 
Art Daily in the "Top Five" 
of quality websites.





© ArtDaily.org








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Exactly 102 Years Ago Today

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Imagine...
A God named THEA, short for Atheasta
Or a God named God
Or Buddah
Or Allah
 Or Babruth
Or Insert Your Name here 
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Imagine...
Every time a new baby is born, this person is responsible 
for select body parts that comprise a human being.
 On the top most shelf of the supply room,
 there it was–bubble-wrapped 
 and stamped  PSV 
 (Perfect Singing Voice)         



April 25, 1915        
  
Exactly one hundred and two years ago today:
it was given to a not-so-distant cousin of Scott Fitzgerald.
Her name is  Ella Jane Fitzgerald.
She was born with the Perfect Singing Voice...

The GREAT AMERICAN SONGBOOK
 was created for her.
I will prove this now:


With Count Basies's Band, Ella sings
the Irving Berlin classic:
I've Got My Love To Keep Me Warm


Duke Ellington's  Take The A Train
is a subway local with a vocal
by Queen Ella.


The brilliance of Gershwin's  They All Laughed
is it is both a classic song and a valuable history lesson.
Laugh along with Ella.


After a 15-second un-skipable advert,
you can hear Ella sing Sole Porter's
most controversial song:
Love For Sale


If Rodgers and Hart's  Bewitched, Bothered and Bewildered
were included in every American high school poetry book,
American students would put all others to shame.
Hit it, Ella and don't forget
the "ants in your pants."
































































































Click  here  for the possibility of 50 + minutes
of the only vocal duets that inspire the Great Creator
to take the phone off the hook.

I end this page with two people
who make their home on Mt. Olympus:
Ella Fitzgerald and Louis Armstrong.



It would be
a great deprivation
to your ears
if this page
excluded
Ella + Louis
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Photoverio © (#88): Midnight Duomo In Milano

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© Oliverio
Some people think they can  scaffold  their way to Heaven.

I am okay with riding a  bus  to paradise,
as long as it does not breakdown in the desert. 
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Pure Zelda

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Stella brought a Christmas cake to the studio, and two chickens  
for Madame that she received from her uncle in Normandy. 

Her uncle wrote her that he could send no more money: 
the franc was down to forty. 

Stella made her living copying sheet music, 
which ruined her eyes and left her starving. 

She lived in a garret and got sinus troubles    
from the drafts, but she would not 
give up her days at the studio.

What can a Pole do in Paris? 
she said to Alabama. 

What can anybody do in Paris?

When it comes to fundamentals, 
nationalities do not count for much.
Zelda Fitzgerald
Save Me The Waltz


Published in  1932





















The next Fitzgerald page is  here. ________________________________________________________________________________________________
   

.....................................7th Street 5AM (90802).....................................

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Almost There

'Twas A Mighty Cold Blur!
© Oliverio  (5x)
On Route to Park Avenue Starbucks
to sit with the King
after letting the 
camera 
swing 
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There Was A Time

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Donovan
The Dylan of the Mother Country





There was a time
I thought of
mine only
Could it be
occurred to me
 while lonely






1001 is an approximate number of how many memories 
I have of this 1967 album.  I would bore you beyond death 
were I to list ten or more of those memories.

Therefore, I will begin and end with the first ones:
was a gift from my mother.

What had her teenage son done to deserve it?

She caught him smoking pot but her comment 
in response to that capture rings in his head 
whenever he listens to this extraordinary  box set:

It was only pot, Thank God it wasn't grass.

He–her son (who is actually me)–last listened 
to this Donovan album three hours ago.

That is why this page exists!
That is why–this day–I will 
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...........................................Sit Right Down............................................

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I'm gonna sit right down
and write myself a letter
and make believe it came from you

Dear Paul
Forty-four years and forty days ago,
I began my endless sleep and your mother
 did the same forty-four years ago, come October.
Then–and only then–did you become the perfect son.
We love you madly, we need you badly but no time soon.
I love your mother but I also love Eleanor.
Eleanor loves it when she and Grace laugh in my face
or behind my back or anywhere they want to.
Eleanor loves me but not as much as she loves Carol.
However, we do not want to see you here anytime soon.
Elanor insists that her daughter kiss our daughter's daughter's son.
That would be Sam and Grace's great-grandson:
Christopher Owen
That is, Mr. and Mrs. CarPeo must get 
their collective ass to Virginia,
en route to Long Beach. 


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Thursday, April 23, 2015

The Cancellation Of Nice

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A young man was stopped at a traffic light.
Facing him, from the oncoming turn lane, 
was a yellow 2012 Saturn with matching 
blonde hair  behind  the wheel.  

She was  looking straight at him and smiling 
while her left-turn signal flashed.
The young man smiled back at her  

even though he was not in the turn lane. 

He was in the only thru traffic lane, facing west. 
When the light  turned green, he did not move his car 
but courteously signaled to the woman to make 
her turn and she proceeded to do so.

Her smile widened, as did a young man's spontaneous fantasy.  

But then she was gone from his life.  

A tractor-trailer,  immediately  behind her Saturn, 
also made the left turn in front of the young man's 
2005 Nissan Sentra. 

A baritone truck horn honked approvingly.
  
Both the blonde and the truck driver would no doubt 
regard this young man as a nice person 
for yielding to their vehicles.
 

But if you looked in the rear view mirror of the Sentra, 
you would  see no evidence of automotive gratitude.

Five irate drivers were delayed in the thru traffic lane 

even though  they had the right-of-way. 

They could not move  their cars  until  the  Safeway truck,  
with its mural of ten-feet-tall bananas and other lush fruit, 
had completed a left turn.
 

All because of a "nice" young man.


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Footnote
THE CANCELLATION OF NICE is the copyrighted property of LCSoL.
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