Monday, February 29, 2016

The 56th Bullet: God's Favorite People

________________________________________________________________________________________________


Above all, God loves atheists
because they keep Him on His toes.  

________________________________________________________________________________________________
 Footnote
THE 56th BULLET  is the copyrighted property of  LCSoL.

Only the first 45 Bullets are linked together
because we do not want to make life easy
for our favorite thieves.
________________________________________________________________________________________________


Imperfectly Echoing Eco: R.I.P. Umberto (Echoing = Reproducing)

________________________________________________________________________________________________


by



________________________________________________________________________________________________


The 55th Bullet: The New Redundancy

________________________________________________________________________________________________


Being in love means an extremely short
shelf life for any hateful feelings
that get thrown into the mix.  

________________________________________________________________________________________________
 Footnote
THE 55th BULLET  is the copyrighted property of  LCSoL.

Only the first 45 Bullets are linked together
because we do not want to make life easy
for our favorite thieves.
________________________________________________________________________________________________


Omnidirectional: The bottom words to the top

________________________________________________________________________________________________


The Yardbirds
Over, under, sideways, down
backwards, forwards, 
square and round

Birds in sky, birds in yard
Yardbirds add meat
to the sound
________________________________________________________________________________________________


Sunday, February 28, 2016

Found Poetry

________________________________________________________________________________________________

_______________________________________________________________________

______________________________________________

The bottom words to the top.
If ever a tattooed sentence were
welcome, that is it, here it is.
Love has no sweeter words.

______________________________________________

_______________________________________________________________________
________________________________________________________________________________________________


Quoting The Wolves

________________________________________________________________________________________________
    
    
Why are they not in
the Rock n' Roll
Hall of Fame?
The advantage of being 
in high places
is that you never 
have to look up

Los Lobos
________________________________________________________________________________________________

        

Suddenly...Out Of Nowhere...There Was WORLD PEACE

________________________________________________________________________________________________

The GOD Summit proved what I have said all along:

G-O-D is an acronym.

The Group Of Deities reached the binary point: 
either they destroy the war-obsessed earth 
or give the earth everlasting peace.

No. It was not exactly  "out of nowhere" 
but World Peace was a result
of executive action by 
the ultimate executives.

Of course this meant the world first experienced 
a re-distribution of power between
its leaders and its losers. 

Former ISIS generals became future shortstops 
of the Chicago Cubs. Men and women
on Death Row became faculty members
at Yale and Dartmouth. 

The Joint Chiefs of Staff became 
Walmart Greeters. 

Presidents,  CEO's, studio chiefs and Chancellors,  
became junior high school teachers.

The Middle East, where Arabs hated Jews 
and vice versa, where everybody tried to kill
everybody else was declared–in its entirety–
a sand box of infinite dimension to be occupied 
exclusively by children under the age of eight, 
regardless of race, religion, color or creed.

And the Colossoleum was not to be confused
with the Colosseum.

The latter was a historical landmark in Rome 
and the former became a universal construction 
project: a stadium to be approximately 
the size of Cincinnati.

Everyone in the world was happy and content 
with nothing but friendly feelings 
about everyone else. 

National borders still existed but all 
were re-painted with rainbow colors. 

The universal mantra–translated into 
1369 languages–was this: 
There are no more Christians,
Jews, Muslims or Buddhists.
There is just us!

Religious expression required the presence 
of at least five people in a room where everyone 
got to say something funny and everyone 
else laughed–whether or not 
they understood the joke. 

All church members shared 
the Holy Communionizer.
That is, everybody ate 
chocolate. 

Every military (or street) weapon that had
existed anywhere–in any country–
was melted down and used 
as housing material. 

All bombed-out villages and abandoned 
ghetto neighborhoods were converted
to farmland.

By order of god and that is spelt G-O-D.

You can fool some of the people all of the time 
or all of the people some of the time 
but you could never, ever fool 
the executive Group of Deities.

There was even an invisible deity.
His name was Atheismo.

Stock markets throughout the world
were all converted into art museums 
and all Art Museums–with absolutely 
nothing coming down from their walls–
became 24/7 social centers.

Military installations throughout
the universe became Schools of Theater.
Instead of teaching soldiers how to kill,
they taught everyone how to act.

World peace was empirical but people
did have memories and war was remembered 
by anyone who was ever in a war zone. 

Everyone else remembered war from 
seeing it on television or reading 
about it in history books.

That explains why the Colossaleum was built. 


It was to be a staging place for "fake wars" 
with a physical audience of millions 
and a broadcast audience of billions.

All nations and principalities participated 
in the "Fake Wars" which were staged annually, 
sponsored by the International Olympic Committee.

The only weapons available to the fake warriors
were water balloons and the rewards for battle 
were keys to the city of the soldier's choice
and a lifetime supply of chocolate.

But in a world fraught with peace and love, 
in a world devoid of hatred and violence, 
people still died. 

Funeral parlors still existed and prospered 
but services for the deceased were not the same.

There were no tears shed for the corpse: 
only smiles, laughter, and applause. 

The last of these was in response to a reading 
of what the deceased did–or did not do–
in his or her lifetime.

But the strangest thing that happened 
involved El Illal Mubitah.

The former ISIS mastermind changed his name
to Ernie Bunks, became an All-star shortstop 
and led the Chicago Cubs 
to a World Series victory!   
   
    
________________________________________________________________________________________________
Footnotes
SUDDENLY...OUT OF NOWHERE...THERE WAS WORLD PEACE
is the copyrighted property of LCSoL.

This story is dedicated to  Umberto Eco  and his story  Stars and Stripes.

But if I had read anything written by Mr. Eco before he died, this story would not exist.

He died last week.
________________________________________________________________________________________________


Saturday, February 27, 2016

From A Museum Endowed By The Son Of Sam Daughter Of Sam


________________________________________________________________________________________________

CRYSTAL BRIDGES  debuts exhibition featuring
100+ images from the 1950s to today

Inge Morath, Outside Memphis, Tennesee, 1960

If you're going
to Bentonville,
tell  Alice Walton
the CarPeos
love her, dearly!
The Daughter of Sam
________________________________________________________________________________________________


Swinging Sunset Bag Trees

________________________________________________________________________________________________


 © Poem written by Mrs. Oliverio ©

Image source: Jay Pegg
Finger knitting
circles of lady trees.
plaiting their branches
for the soon to arrive,
softly pastel buds.

They watch the young
and mature male trees,
muscled from boxing
the swinging plastic bags,
yellow but mostly whitish.

Songs stick in your head.
Birds perhaps formed songs
in trees, to remember,
make traffic signals.
Is this why we chant?


________________________________________________________________________________________________


Adan And Eva With A Speechless Model

________________________________________________________________________________________________


© Mrs. Oliverio





Who you posin' for, Galgoni?











________________________________________________________________________________________________
Footnote
The saga of Adan and Eva began  here.

The saga of Adan and Eva continues  there. 
________________________________________________________________________________________________


© © © Tchotchke Poem No.2 From The Long Beach Jetty © © ©

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Little Alice
dances to a different drum
immersing herself
in a cup of rum

She doesn't 
need to rock
when Jetty rocks
beckon to her call

Tapping out inverted rhythm:
Well- well- well- folks
tha- tha- that's all 

© Oliverio

________________________________________________________________________________________________


© © © Tchotchke Poem No.1 From The Long Beach Jetty © © ©

________________________________________________________________________________________________

YoYo Yolanda
(sister of Miranda)
is well worth a gander

With her back to the sea
she is staring at me

Her first visit to the Jetty
she's so cute
she's so pretty

© Oliverio
_______________________________________________________________________________________________


Friday, February 26, 2016

19th Century Poem + A 21st Century Cartoon For Donald Trump

________________________________________________________________________________________________

____________________________________________________________________________________

________________________________________________________________________

I drive through the streets and I care not a damn,
The people they stare, and they ask who I am;
And if I should chance to run over a cad,
I can pay for the damage if ever so bad,
So pleasant it is to have money, heigh ho!
So pleasant it is to have money.
Arthur Hugh Clough
(1850)

____________________________________________________________

____________________________________________________________


Paul Noth

The next Donald Trump page is  here.
________________________________________________________________________

____________________________________________________________________________________

________________________________________________________________________________________________


Thursday, February 25, 2016

Where Honesty Belongs In The Back Of The Bus

________________________________________________________________________________________________

When people rave about a stand-up comic
for "being honest"—as if the comedian's
picture belongs in the dictionary
next to the word "Honesty"—
it opens a big can of worms.

Does it mean other comics are "dishonest?"

NO!
It means those people know
diddly-squat about stand-up comedy.
"Honesty" is not the bailiwick of the stand-up:
Being funny is!

But the best stand-ups
do more than that:
they take us to the greater truths
of the human condition.

Whether they are honest or otherwise
is not as important as making us laugh
at such foibles that highlight
our human condition.
________________________________________________________________________________________________


Dancing To Jammin' The Blues

________________________________________________________________________________________________







(Marie Bryant + Archie Savage)
________________________________________________________________________________________________


The Triangularity Of The Long Beach Jetty

________________________________________________________________________________________________


© Oliverio
To Be Continued
________________________________________________________________________________________________


A Very Vertical View Of The Long Beach Jetty

________________________________________________________________________________________________


© Oliverio
To Be Continued

________________________________________________________________________________________________


The Long Beach Jetty Is A Sea Gull's Stop And Pose

________________________________________________________________________________________________


© Oliverio
To Be Continued
________________________________________________________________________________________________


On The Road To The Long Beach Jetty

________________________________________________________________________________________________





© Oliverio (4x)

       
© Oliverio
    
Almost there
________________________________________________________________________________________________


Monday, February 22, 2016

He Said...She Said...(He/She #47) © Now, In Taller Text

________________________________________________________________________________________________

_________________________________________________________________________________

____________________________________________________________

"Now, it can be told."

"What can be told?"

"Obviously, I was about to tell you."

"Then proceed, my lovely."

"He confessed to me today."

"He being, I presume, Marcel DuTramp."

"Yes, the one and only  Poet Laureate
  of the  Long Beach Jetty."

"Well, first he told us to pronounce his name
  to rhyme with the Donald, as in DuTrump.
  Then he told us..."
 
"Not us, he told you!"

"I stand corrected. He told me to pronounce
 his name exactly the way it is spelt.

"Today, he told me that Trump is not only
 how it should be pronounced but that he
 is more related to the Donald than to 
 Marcel Duchamp,  the artist!"

"Holy Mona Lisa's mustache!"

"He also told me that under no circumstances,
 would Donald Trump accept the Presidential
 candidacy. He said that Donald told him this
 and that Mr. Trump told no one else."

"Aint that a kick in the donkey's ass. Go on."

"He said that Donald became a candidate on a bet
  that he could win the primaries but, in truth, he is
  more performance artist than candidate."

"A shock therapy performance artist with a fecal tongue."

"Exactly. Donald described himself to Marcel as 
  every man's alter ego: being able to always say
  exactly what is on his mind, regardless
  of how offensive it is."

"Yes, everyone would love to call every idiot 'an idiot'
  but protocol and human decency do not allow us to do
  so because we are part of a kinder and gentler species."

"Exactly. Why would any multi-billionaire subject 
  himself to the heavy labor and utter ridicule and 
  constant road blocks of being the President
  of the United States in the 21st Century?"

"Especially after Trump challenged the birthplace
 of Barack Obama and that stupid claim has been
 completely forgotten"

"What do you mean?"

"Pardon my metaphor but the chicken would
 come home to roost because  Trump's hair 
 and skin color and attitude make it obvious 
 that Mr. Trump was born somewhere other than
 Planet Earth. He really doesn't look human!"

"Well...We heard it first! Trump will not accept
 the nomination!"

"You mean you heard it first. I heard it second."

"Whatever."

"You know what?"

"What?"

"I do not now nor have I ever believed
 a single word of anything Marcel DuTrump
 has to say but I definitely enjoy every word of it!" 
____________________________________________________________

_________________________________________________________________________________

________________________________________________________________________________________________
Footnote
The next Trump page is  here.
________________________________________________________________________________________________


Marlowe Morris, Marie Bryant, Lester Young, Red Callendar

________________________________________________________________________________________________


The silhouettes are identified from left to right.

This image was photographed while watching
Jammin' The Blues  and being utterly exhilarated 
by the artistry of the music and video.

The trumpeter of the band, Harry "Sweets" Edison,
is featured on  this page  and the jazz video
can be viewed by clicking on a link there
or  just by clicking  here. 

This would be a much better world
if  Marie Bryant  were one-tenth
as famous as Kobe Bryant.

If you do not know who 
Kobe Bryant is,
then please ignore
the previous paragraph. 

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________


Sung To The Tune Of Buddy Holly's Peggy Sue

________________________________________________________________________________________________


Peggy Guggenheim

Richer than sin
but her money was spent
so that fans of modern art
would win!
Peggy Gu
Peggy Gu
The Modern Art 
world needed you

Oh Peggy
Oh my Peggy gu
gen
heim
...
...
________________________________________________________________________________________________
Footnotes
To learn more about Ms. Guggenheim, click  here. 

To hear Buddy Holly's Peggy Sue, click  there.
________________________________________________________________________________________________


The Shock Of The Nude

________________________________________________________________________________________________


Naked lovers cause voyeurs viewers to lose their heads.

For those with a fetish
for factual information,
click  here.
________________________________________________________________________________________________


Iondustrious Was Not Seated

________________________________________________________________________________________________

The authors of Genesis, Ecclesiastes, Psalms and Proverbs
were seated at a table with Isaiah, Matthew, Mark and Luke. 

They were dining and drinking and high-fiving each other
for having written the most famous book
in the Christian world.

These  authors were in great spirits because
their royalty payments had just been delivered.

Someone who was not in great spirits and who was not 
seated at this table was Iondustrious.

Like everyone at the feast, Iondustrious–then
a cub reporter for the Palestine Palaver–
was hired by Bibles Inc. to contribute
to THE BIG BOOK.

Iondustrious was selected to report
on God's anatomical output.

He wrote things like
In the old factory, where God made all the noses...


But his report never made it into THE BIG BOOK.

However,  Iondustrious begat two words:
"olfactory" and "industrious."

No dictionary acknowledges
the Biblical source of those two words.

No history book acknowledges Iondustrious
and, of course, the Bible never mentions his name.

He has never been credited for existing
until this very moment.

   
________________________________________________________________________________________________
Footnotes
IONDUSTRIOUS WAS NOT SEATED
is the copyrighted property of LCSoL.

The image is from  here.

In slightly altered form,
the story of Iondustrious
originated in 2002. 
________________________________________________________________________________________________


Sunday, February 21, 2016

Photoverio © (#164): Trumpeter Descending An Octave

________________________________________________________________________________________________


© Oliverio
Based on an image from  here.

The title is based on an image from  there. 
________________________________________________________________________________________________


A Monument To Math Anxiety (Comic Relief #970)

________________________________________________________________________________________________


Robert Mankoff
________________________________________________________________________________________________


My 2nd Generation Photograph Of A Mysterious Photographer

________________________________________________________________________________________________


Vivian Maier

The  8th Great Wonder  of American Street Photography
was also the  Greatest Mystery  of street photographers.

The above image is from  here. 

The first GodFather of Math page
dedicated to Vivian Maier is  there.  
________________________________________________________________________________________________


This Is Not...This Is (TIN/TI #22)

________________________________________________________________________________________________




 
THIS IS NOT 
A Billie Holiday Song
from 1939


    THIS IS
A Billie Holiday Song
from 1939
     




The first image is a rare vinyl 45 RPM
of a most familiar  Beatles' song
recorded in 1965. 
 
The second image links to a Billie Holiday song 
recorded three years before 
Paul McCartney
was born.

YESTERDAYS was written
by Jerome Kern in 1933.

The next page in this series is  here.

The next Beatles' page is  there. 
 _______________________________________________________________________________________________


Photoverio © (#164): The Jungle Gym Faceless Face In The Sky

________________________________________________________________________________________________


© Oliverio
Written by Mrs. CarPeo






Look up little one,
There in the sky,
The pipes march by,
A tune is in the air.
 

Not a clack,
The faceless face
Jaunty, not black,
Not blank.
________________________________________________________________________________________________


Friday, February 19, 2016

In Between: A Haiku [HKu #1]

________________________________________________________________________________________________

_______________________________________________________________________

______________________________________________

Between words
are other words
unspoken
but louder than
what is heard

______________________________________________

_______________________________________________________________________

________________________________________________________________________________________________
Footnotes
IN BETWEEN is the copyrighted property of LCSoL.

The next GoFather Haiku, slightly inflated [syllabically] is  here.
________________________________________________________________________________________________


The 54th Bullet: History Lesson

________________________________________________________________________________________________


History can never be 100% accurate
because it would take too long to write.  

________________________________________________________________________________________________
 Footnote
THE 54th BULLET  is the copyrighted property of  LCSoL.
________________________________________________________________________________________________


Thursday, February 18, 2016

Ode To A Terra Cotta Collage

________________________________________________________________________________________________

You can see the sea  symbolically
chevroned at the base of the terra cotta
and you gotta see the fish swimming
and the curlicues frothing as eagles dip
down into the water but who 
will rise to the gold prize?
Let us award it
to your eyes.

________________________________________________________________________________________________
Footnote
ODE TO A TERRA COTTA COLLAGE and the photograph
are the copyrighted property of LCSoL.
________________________________________________________________________________________________


Wednesday, February 17, 2016

.... There Is A Time To Resist And There Is A Time To NOT Resist ....

________________________________________________________________________________________________

 
A judge has ordered the company to continue 
assisting the government in its attempt to mine data
from the phone used by a gunman
in the deadly San Bernardino attack
...


________________________________________________________________________________________________


And Now Presenting: The Gazillionth Alice In Wonderland Film

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Through The Looking Glass  has been slated for a May 27, 2016
release date by Disney, so the fact that they are starting production
 this year is a sign that the studio wants a lot of time to be spent
working on the film. After all, the first one made over a billion
dollars at the box office, and one can imagine they would love
to see a repeat of that success.
 
I am falling
But I am not slumming
I am falling
Because the sequel is coming
 

 Being billed as the sequel to Tim Burton's  Alice in Wonderland
 from 2010, this film is not to be confused 
with the animated Disney version of 1951.
(Unless, of course, your ingested 
chemicals of fashion tell you otherwise.)

Your eyes should recognize the image above
as Ms. Alice descending the rabbit hole.

  I hope the eyes of  math professor Charles Lutwidge Dodgson
Lewis Carroll, who wrote Alice's Adventures in Wonderland,
are seeing nothing but dollar signs for his estate.

That novel was published in  1865
and its sequel, Through The Looking Glass,
was published in  1871. 

As a graduate of the  Lewis Carroll School of Logic,
I now be do tell you that were the creator of Alice to see
this preview  of a 2016 sequel, all he would say is

Such is human perversity!
Happy Hyperlinking to all who read this!
 _______________________________________________________________________________________________