Suddenly...Out Of Nowhere...There Was WORLD PEACE

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The GOD Summit proved what I have said all along:

G-O-D is an acronym.

The Group Of Deities reached the binary point: 
either they destroy the war-obsessed earth 
or give the earth everlasting peace.

No. It was not exactly  "out of nowhere" 
but World Peace was a result
of executive action by 
the ultimate executives.

Of course this meant the world first experienced 
a re-distribution of power between
its leaders and its losers. 

Former ISIS generals became future shortstops 
of the Chicago Cubs. Men and women
on Death Row became faculty members
at Yale and Dartmouth. 

The Joint Chiefs of Staff became 
Walmart Greeters. 

Presidents,  CEO's, studio chiefs and Chancellors,  
became junior high school teachers.

The Middle East, where Arabs hated Jews 
and vice versa, where everybody tried to kill
everybody else was declared–in its entirety–
a sand box of infinite dimension to be occupied 
exclusively by children under the age of eight, 
regardless of race, religion, color or creed.

And the Colossoleum was not to be confused
with the Colosseum.

The latter was a historical landmark in Rome 
and the former became a universal construction 
project: a stadium to be approximately 
the size of Cincinnati.

Everyone in the world was happy and content 
with nothing but friendly feelings 
about everyone else. 

National borders still existed but all 
were re-painted with rainbow colors. 

The universal mantra–translated into 
1369 languages–was this: 

There are no more Christians,

Jews, Muslims or Buddhists.

There is just us!

Religious expression required the presence 
of at least five people in a room where everyone 
got to say something funny and everyone 
else laughed–whether or not 
they understood the joke. 

All church members shared 
the Holy Communionizer.
That is, everybody ate 
chocolate. 

Every military (or street) weapon that had
existed anywhere–in any country–
was melted down and used 
as housing material. 

All bombed-out villages and abandoned 
ghetto neighborhoods were converted
to farmland.

By order of god and that is spelt G-O-D.

You can fool some of the people all of the time 
or all of the people some of the time 
but you could never, ever fool 
the executive Group of Deities.

There was even an invisible deity.
His name was Atheismo.

Stock markets throughout the world
were all converted into art museums 
and all Art Museums–with absolutely 
nothing coming down from their walls–
became 24/7 social centers.

Military installations throughout
the universe became Schools of Theater.
Instead of teaching soldiers how to kill,
they taught everyone how to act.

World peace was empirical but people
did have memories and war was remembered 
by anyone who was ever in a war zone. 

Everyone else remembered war from 
seeing it on television or reading 
about it in history books.

That explains why the Colossaleum was built. 

It was to be a staging place for "fake wars" 
with a physical audience of millions 
and a broadcast audience of billions.

All nations and principalities participated 
in the "Fake Wars" which were staged annually, 
sponsored by the International Olympic Committee.

The only weapons available to the fake warriors
were water balloons and the rewards for battle 
were keys to the city of the soldier's choice
and a lifetime supply of chocolate.

But in a world fraught with peace and love, 
in a world devoid of hatred and violence, 
people still died. 

Funeral parlors still existed and prospered 
but services for the deceased were not the same.

There were no tears shed for the corpse: 
only smiles, laughter, and applause. 

The last of these was in response to a reading 
of what the deceased did–or did not do–
in his or her lifetime.

But the strangest thing that happened 
involved El Illal Mubitah.

The former ISIS mastermind changed his name
to Ernie Bunks, became an All-star shortstop 
and led the Chicago Cubs 
to a World Series victory!   

   
    

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Footnotes

SUDDENLY...OUT OF NOWHERE...THERE WAS WORLD PEACE

is the copyrighted property of LCSoL.

This story is dedicated to  Umberto Eco  and his story  Stars and Stripes.

But if I had read anything written by Mr. Eco before he died, this story would not exist.

He died last week.

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