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1.
I had the uke
in my mouth
and ran through
the parking lots:
Tony's and B'hack
I was anxious
to get to the Bowl:
Linda was already there
2.
We went to confession together
in my mouth
and ran through
the parking lots:
Tony's and B'hack
I was anxious
to get to the Bowl:
Linda was already there
2.
We went to confession together
yesterday at St. Anthony's.
Mother drove us there
Mother drove us there
at exactly 4PM
and made certain,
by sitting in the last pew
of the church,
that we actually stepped
inside the confessionals
and spent the requisite time
confessing our sins.
my older sister to think
just like me:
Mother (and sometimes Father)
knew all of our sins, even before
we commit them.
Of course, we did not actually
believe this to be fact
but imagination is truth's
dance partner.
Of course, we did not actually
believe this to be fact
but imagination is truth's
dance partner.
We imagined Mother would consult
with Father Eugene in the rectory
—delivering him a Saturday Night
home-baked creme pie—
with a checklist.
Father, did Paul confess to all of the following...
Father, did Linda confess to all of the following...
She would deliver
the creme pie
sometimes as late
as 10:30 but the rectory
always opened
its doors wide for
the most beautiful
woman in Rocky Point,
despite the fact
that she virtually never
attended Mass.
But she was always present
in the church on Saturdays,
supervising her penitent
son and daughter.
The vote to determine
But she was always present
in the church on Saturdays,
supervising her penitent
son and daughter.
The vote to determine
the most beautiful woman
in Rocky Point was decided by
exactly two people:
Paul and Linda.
Paul and Linda.
There would have been
a third vote but Father
refrained because he opposed
belaboring the obvious.
And he was not made of mud
but he sure could
sling the slang.
He called St. Anthony's church
Tony's place where the Eucharist
was the uke.
B'hack was his name
for Bohack's Supermarket ARS
(And Record Store)
The Pasquale Pasta family,
our next-door neighbors
were delighted by the nickname
Ronzoni because they were all born
in Italy and learned a lot of English
by reading adverts for Ronzoni's
enriched spaghetti.
The Sugar Bowl Soda Parlor,
which is where most of the action
in this story takes place,
was crowned The Bowl
by my mother.
Everyone in Rocky Point
called it that but she said it first.
Only the summer residents
used my Father's slang names
for places, things, and people.
3.
The year-round residents
of Rocky Point, for the most part,
shunned the summer people.
They regarded us as rich city folk
who could afford a second home.
It was commonly said
that our parents looked like
(And Record Store)
The Pasquale Pasta family,
our next-door neighbors
were delighted by the nickname
Ronzoni because they were all born
in Italy and learned a lot of English
by reading adverts for Ronzoni's
enriched spaghetti.
The Sugar Bowl Soda Parlor,
which is where most of the action
in this story takes place,
was crowned The Bowl
by my mother.
Everyone in Rocky Point
called it that but she said it first.
Only the summer residents
used my Father's slang names
for places, things, and people.
3.
The year-round residents
of Rocky Point, for the most part,
shunned the summer people.
They regarded us as rich city folk
who could afford a second home.
It was commonly said
that our parents looked like
brother and sister which may explain
why my sister and her brother
were closer thanthe spots on the dice.
But any hanky-panky between us
ended at Linda's eighth birthday party
—July 9, 1954—
when a boy kissed her behind a tree
and she socked him in the nose,
drawing blood and breaking
his glasses.
(Nine years later, they deflowered each other.
Something she had secretly yearned for
since the first kiss after his family
moved out of Rocky Point.)
She had no shortage
of kissing buddies during
those nine years.
Billy Nevin was the only one
to get beyond first base
but never hit a home run
with my sister.
Or so I want to believe.
3.
Anyway, I was saying
at the beginning of this story
that my sister didn't receive
Holy Communion that day
at the beginning of this story
that my sister didn't receive
Holy Communion that day
—August 17, 1962—
despite having gone to confession
the day before.
I had seen her the night before
rolled up in a beach blanket
with Billy Nevin, whose father
had just taken us
to our first Yankee game.
to our first Yankee game.
Yogi Berra and Mickey Mantle both hit
grand slams while Whitey Ford shut out
the Baltimore Orioles.
The final score was 15-0.
Yeah, I was with Billy
on the beach and it was a full moon.
Of course, I let him touch my titties.
After receiving the Communion wafer,
I walked straight out of the door
of St. Anthony's, ran across the parking lot.
Then I ran across Bohack Supermarket's
Then I ran across Bohack Supermarket's
parking lot and then
I was in the Sugar Bowl.
But I had covered my face
when I ran by the front
of the supermarket
because of the main reason
I had to go to confession
yesterday.
Father forgive me...
I shoplifted at Bohack's
on Tuesday
Father forgive me...
I shoplifted at Bohack's
on Tuesday
Father Eugene asked for specifics:
I stole a 45RPM
It fit so easily inside my shirt.
It fit so easily inside my shirt.
Which song?
STAY by Maurice Williams and the Zodiacs.
That's a great song, Pa...
He almost said my name which is a no-no
because the confession is supposed
to be totally anonymous.
to be totally anonymous.
That's why there was no lighting
in the confessional booth.
No lighting when the priest
slides open that thing in front
of the screen where you can barely
make out his silhouette
and vice versa.
(But, of course,
the confessor always knew
which priest was there.)
It was time
for Father Eugene
to give me my penance:
That's a great song...
of the screen where you can barely
make out his silhouette
and vice versa.
(But, of course,
the confessor always knew
which priest was there.)
It was time
for Father Eugene
to give me my penance:
That's a great song...
STAY is an essential...
like Elvis' Hound Dog...
like Elvis' Hound Dog...
but that doesn't justify stealing it.
Say three our Fathers and six Hail Marys...
Say three our Fathers and six Hail Marys...
Not a bad price to pay
for a great piece of music.
4.
I arrive at the Sugar Bowl
—Dion and the Belmonts—
had disbanded and Mr.
or Mrs. Sugar Bowl
removed all their songs
from their fabled jukebox.
The day before, however,
Dion's Run Around Sue
had just been added
to the "Sugar Box."
Father Eugene had administered
the Eucharist and probably
because he liked Maurice Williams
so much, he gave me
a supersized communion wafer.
It was still stuck
to the roof of my tongue
when I sat down
the Eucharist and probably
because he liked Maurice Williams
so much, he gave me
a supersized communion wafer.
It was still stuck
to the roof of my tongue
when I sat down
Linda is at the front table with Billy,
his cousin Marie and Nicky Lomangino
who was the only one of our friends
who had more records than I did.
All 45s as in 45 RPM's.
Those thin slices of circular vinyl.
commonly referred to as "singles."
He had maybe three hundred
and I had almost two hundred
but I also had a bunch of albums
mostly thanks to my mother
who was a big time
Miles Davis fan.
who was a big time
Miles Davis fan.
At the age of eleven,
I liked to think of myself
as sophisticated enough
I liked to think of myself
as sophisticated enough
to appreciate jazz.
But, in truth, I had
as much sophistication
as poison ivy.
No sophisticated Catholic
would ever walk out
of church with the Eucharist
clinging to his/her palate.
as much sophistication
as poison ivy.
No sophisticated Catholic
would ever walk out
of church with the Eucharist
clinging to his/her palate.
5.
Billy, Marie and Nicky had all been
to the 9 o'clock mass and were sitting
in the Sugar Bowl for over an hour.
Their breakfasts consisted
of three egg nogs.
TO BE CONTINUED
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