The Sad Saga Of Nooly Schakeldt

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Nooly Schakeldt was arrested for committing

a crime against the state but no one knew

which state it was.

The arresting officers were instructed to take

Nooly to Jails 'r Us,

the chain store penitentiary.

Nooly Schakeldt was to be detained indefinitely

or for thirty days, depending on which came first.

Nooly was guilty of "Random Selection,"

according to Wally Wimzly, the Chief of Police.

Whenever there was a vacancy in Jails 'r Us,

Chief Wimzly randomly selected a name

from the burgeoning ranks of
Socially Extraneaous People. 

Nooly qualified for the drawing

because he was gainfully unemployed.

He was assigned to the Linen Department

of Jails 'r Us and he got

clean sheets daily.

His cell was air-conditioned by

the foul breath of his cellmate,

Orville Stenchly, the garlic swindler.

Since thirty days precedes infinity,

Nooly Schakeldt was discharged

from jail  after serving one month.

Chief Wimzly gave him a quarter

to make his first phone call.

This caused Nooly to wonder:

if there is Free Speech

then why are there

pay telephones?

     

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Footnotes

THE SAD SAGA OF NOOLY SCHAKELDT

ia the copyrighted property of LCSoL

It was originally written

in 1981

If Franz Kafka had been
a stand-up comic,
I could have been arrested
for plagiarism

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