Sunday, July 28, 2019

The 130th Bullet: Basic Symbolism

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As technology thrusts forward
and science penetrates the future,
remember that Progress
is our most symbolic phallus.
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Footnote
THE 130th BULLET
is the copyrighted property
of the Lewis Carroll School of Logic
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Monday, July 22, 2019

This Is NOT An Epitaph

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He was a team player
only when he could be
the team captain
or the team mascot.

Sometimes, he was both.
...


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Footnote
A TWO SENTENCE STORY
IN SEARCH OF A CLOSING PARAGRAPH
is the copyrighted property of LCSoL
________________________________________________________________________________________________

Friday, July 19, 2019

Revisiting A Siamese Cat Named Pythagorus

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Memories of my first cat
in California are vague and hazy:
befitting the image below

In December of 1984,
I was a marginally employed
mathematician immersed
in a research project based
on the Pythagorean Theorem

A friend gave me 
a furry, pre-named
Christmas gift
  

The research project morphed into
this published paper

My feline family morphed into
what was last seen
here

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Photo #377: Bravado On The Corkboard

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© Oliverio
Yogur T. Pretzellman

 
With my pretzel face
and childproof torso
I aim to please
more and than
more so

With wire twister arms
and raisin feet
I am so cute
so cool and
so neat

You've seen me before
this I know
on a page
also named
Photoverio

But I can't see you,
need I mention,
because this image
lacks a third dimension

On your parade
I mean not to rain
but being two-dimensional
I can feel no pain

No eyesight
no memory:
without third dimension
I am compromisingly free

________________________________________________________________________________________________
Footnote
BRAVADO ON THE CORKBOARD
is the copyrighted property of LCSoL
________________________________________________________________________________________________

Thursday, July 18, 2019

The 129th Bullet: Pity The Child

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Pity the child who rebels against
hard-working, educated parents
by becoming neither.

________________________________________________________________________________________________
Footnote
THE 129th BULLET
is the copyrighted property
of the Lewis Carroll School of Logic
________________________________________________________________________________________________

Tuesday, July 16, 2019

Photoverio #376: Across From The Aquarium

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© Oliverio

Palmistree
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A Sho Time HELMET MOMENT Sponsored By State Farm

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This HELMET MOMENT
is dedicated to
Tyler Skaggs

Photographed by
John McCoy  
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Return Of DJ-Verio ... #285714 ... John Questions Vectors

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How can I go forward when
I don't know which way
I'm facing?

How can I go forward
when I don't know
which way to turn?


How


________________________________________________________________________________________________
Footnotes
A fifteen second advert
precedes the song

The next GoFather/Beatles page
is there

The next DJ-verio page
(without DJ-verio in title)
is
 here  
________________________________________________________________________________________________

Monday, July 15, 2019

He Said ... She Said ...Then Along Came THE INSPECTOR

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"May I please speak with the Inspector?"

"One moment please."

"Thank you."

...

"Hello?"

"Yes, Inspector Kramer?"

"Speaking."

"This is Mr. Anonymouse,
from Verifiable Nonsense Consultants."

"Hmmmm.
What can I do for you, Mr. Anonymouse?"

"It has been brought to our attention
that in the execution of your duties,
you perform without the least bit
of humor or wit."

"That statement
is completely accurate, Sir."

"You do not dispute this claim?"

"Absolutely not because
there is nothing funny 
about being an inspector
when the sole purpose of my job
is to appease the King's appetite
for filling his prison.

"He claims
its construction was divinely inspired.
It was built by his three cousins:
Shem, Ham and Japheth."

"Like the three sons of Noah."

"Yes, but they bear
a closer resemblance
to the Three Stooges.
Anyway, The King believes
that which is divinely inspired
must be occupied."

"Then why doesn't the King
live there?"

"Because he feels he is unworthy."

"Unworthy!
Then tell me:
where does the King live?"

"In a Bronx tenement,
disguised as an auto mechanic."

"Bizarre."

"Yes, bizarre but logical:
like all people of noble origin,
the king was born with a silver spoon
in his mouth.
However, the spoon
was coated with silver spray paint
whose toxic ingredients
caused brain damage
at an early age."

"Really?"

"Yes, really and truly.
Will there be any further questions,
 Mr. Anonymouse?"

"No further questions, Inspector Kramer,
but promise me one thing."

"Which is?

"You never received this phone call."

"I haven't heard a word you said, Sir."

"Thank you."


________________________________________________________________________________________________
Footnotes
HE SAID ... SHE SAID...
THEN ALONG  CAME THE INSPECTOR
is the copyrighted property of LCSoL

Under the title, "The Inspector,"
this page was originally written
on January 2, 1978

It was dedicated to Maxim Gorky
and the Port Jefferson Slavic Center
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Saturday, July 13, 2019

STREET ART UTOPIA #40: Creature From The Dunlop Lagoon

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SLINKACHU


The next page
in this series
is
here 
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Friday, July 12, 2019

Love And Death And Religion = THREE QUOTES

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Women are meant to be loved.
They are not meant to be understood.

:::


The boisterous laughter in the cars
coming from a cemetery
is a safety-valve action.

:::


Religion being the best of things,
its corruptions are likely
to be the worst.

:::
 
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Wednesday, July 10, 2019

What If A 7.1 Earthquake Went Through The Looking Glass ???

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 Maybe it would do less damage
than a 20-kegger frat party

© Oliverio
Opposite 444 Ocean
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Tuesday, July 9, 2019

Quoting Kafka For the Thirty-Seventh Time, Approximately

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Evil transforms itself into your own lips,
lets itself be gnawed by your own teeth
and with these new lips...
you utter the words of goodness
***


Blue Octavo Notebooks 
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Sunday, July 7, 2019

Wide-Eyed At The Wheel: Another Lower-Case Poem

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sleep was in the backseat
wide-eyed was behind the wheel

wide-eyed had a full deck to deal

guilt and shame were hitchhiking
(they were drunk)

wide-eyed hit the brake
he put them in the trunk

memory, against a lamp post
gave wide-eyed
reason to boast

about yesterday
and all its yesters
with a voice that pesters

all that's important
with memory in
the glove compartment

wide-eyed parks at a bus station,
destiny's destination

without hesitation
(and quick on his feet)

he says goodbye to all,
finding sleep in the backseat

***


 _______________________________________________________________________________________________
Footnotes
WOUND, WIRED AND WIDE-EYED
is the copyrighted property of LCSoL

Unlike the previous pages that were created
in the previous century, this poem
was created within the past ten minutes.
________________________________________________________________________________________________

Saturday, July 6, 2019

The Difference Between Infancy And Adulthood Is Paper Thin

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A Baby Has To Poop
An infant learns to independently
relieve bodily excess without needing
Pampers to contain them.

Parents delight when their offspring
reach this stage of development.

It is called "Toilet-training"
when the infant can wipe clean
his/her own excrement.

They reward the infant with praise
and a bowl of his/her favorite pablum.

An Adult Has To Work
An adult learns to graciously accept
the disciplining excesses of those
who can boss him/her around.

Bosses are flattered when employees
follow their orders whether or not
those orders are reasonable.

Such obedience is called 
"toilet-paper-training"
when an employee figuratively
wipes clean anatomical parts
belonging to superiors.

An adult who is properly
toilet-paper-trained
will be duly rewarded
with the bosses' praise
and, figuratively,
a bowl of pablum
added to their paycheck.

***


(1979)
 
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Footnotes
THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN INFANCY
AND ADULTHOOD IS PAPER THIN
is the copyrighted property of LCSol

The original draft of this page
traveled from New York to Hollywood
to Virginia and then to Long Beach
________________________________________________________________________________________________

The Wet Look

________________________________________________________________________________________________

He suddenly cried
but these were not just any tears.

These were tears
that had been in waiting
for many years.

"Tears delayed for years,"
a poet might say.

He hadn't held a woman
in his arms for five years
and he felt more alienated
than an attic.

If loneliness had been a crime,
he would have been a felon.

No dollar in the history of money
had ever experienced
more than two hours
in his pocket.

Given the snowballing effect
of poverty, loneliness and alienation,
an avalanche of tears
cascaded from his face,
saturated his clothes,
and filled the furnished little room
that in his better moments,
he called "home."

He escaped the deluge
through a broken window
in the bathroom.

A neighborhood woman
whom he had long lusted after
but had never spoken with
(except through his mind's eye)
found a dripping wet heap
just outside her door.

Her name was
Good Sara Maritan.

She helped him dry out
and fed him.

The more food she fed him,
the more sympathy
poured from her heart.

A more central part of her anatomy
befriended him
and they became lovers.

Three days later,
he returned home
and found a few tears
on the sofa
which had yet to dry.

They made him laugh
and he never cried again.

***


(1981)  
  

________________________________________________________________________________________________
Footnotes
THE WET LOOK
is the copyrighted property
of LCSoL

The original text travelled from
Hollywood to Virginia
and then to Long Beach.  
________________________________________________________________________________________________

Tuesday, July 2, 2019

Muddy Waters Sang A Song About This Woman

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left a Hefty Bag on the table
with a note that read
When you get lonely
visit your Aunt Mabel

Her absence in itself
is not what makes me bitter
I don't mind her taking the cat
but she could have
cleaned the litter

I checked the liquor cabinet
there was not a drop to drink
They had a glorious last supper:
all the evidence
was in the sink

There is no justice in this world
to you I must confess:
When your woman runs off
with a garbageman
and he doesn't even
clean the mess

***

PAUL OLIVERIO
(1977)

________________________________________________________________________________________________
Footnote
MUDDY WATERS SANG
A SONG ABOUT THIS WOMAN
is the copyrighted property of LCSoL
________________________________________________________________________________________________

The Return Of DJ-verio ... #142857 ... Sing Along With Ella

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Birds do it
Bees do it
Even bugs on a gate
do it

© Oliverio

LET'S DO IT

________________________________________________________________________________________________
Footnotes
These "I-beam" bugs
were mating
for at least four hours

And you may have to wait
for a six second advert
before Ella does it

This series continues
here 
________________________________________________________________________________________________

I Wanted To Write A Poem Today ... But ...

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I wanted to write a poem
but I could not think of a rhyme
then I finally found one
but ran out of time

***

PAUL OLIVERIO

________________________________________________________________________________________________
Footnote
I WANTED TO WRITE A POEM TODAY … BUT
is the copyrighted property of LCSoL
________________________________________________________________________________________________

Monday, July 1, 2019

How Are We Today ... The Doctor Said

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"How are we today?"
said the Doctor
To a man in a paper smock.

"That's the wrong question, Doctor,
You should be asking
Who are we today..."

"I know who I am"
said the doctor.

"Who are YOU today?"

"That depends..."

"On what?"

"On what you have to say
to me after this
paper smock probing."

"What if I say
You ARE NOT well?"

"I will not believe you."

"If I say you ARE well?"

"Then I will wear
my doubts on my sleeve."

"And if you get a spaghetti satin
on that sleeve?"

"It will add color
to my confusion."

"What if I say nothing
and do nothing."

"Then I will treat you
to Starbucks."

"Then I have nothing to say
other than I want a Frappucino."

***

PAUL OLIVERIO

________________________________________________________________________________________________
 Footnotes
HOW ARE WE TODAY...
THE DOCTOR SAID
is the copyrighted property
of LCSoL
________________________________________________________________________________________________