Monday, July 31, 2023

What This Is Not ... What This Is

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© Oliverio ©
It is the hanging shadow of a perpendicular thistle
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Rules Of The Road: The ONLY Thing You Can Do

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You cannot turn left
or think of leftovers

You can only turn right
 
You cannot turn around
or think about baseball,
your mother
or apple pie
 
RIGHT TURN 
ONLY
 
Everything else 
is wrong
***
© Oliverio ©  _______________________________________________________________________________________________

The Problem With Words

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The problem with "words"
is that sometimes
they get in the way
of more important words

In other words:
Learn to say
the right thing
at the right time
 
***

© PAUL OLIVERIO ©
Bullet # 185.5
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The Problem With Pages Like This One

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It was originally posted
two months ago
with every intention
of completing it
with the qualifier:
 
I have 1001 memories
of the playground
under the Whitestone Bridge,
the adjacent park
and the bridge itself
BUT
that is not what this page
is about
 
The page is dedicated
to a dog named TUBBY
and a Swiss-American
architect
 
What I want the viewer 
to notice
is the sense of solid security
provided by
the support beams
of 
the Whitestone Bridge
 
I will complete 
the already posted page
soon
and when I do
there will be a link
to it
in the caption space 
below
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Sunday, July 30, 2023

Another Essential Image With Limited Editing

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Multiple Eleanor
© Mrs. CarPeo
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Two Hydrangea Flowers For Mrs. CarPeo

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© Oliverio
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Friday, July 28, 2023

Sounds Like A Quote From An Existentialist Novel

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It is actually a quote from
the professional basketball player
most responsible for
the first NBA Championship
[after forty-four years of futility]
for the Denver Nuggets
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EGO Demands I Create This Page

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+
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Thursday, July 27, 2023

HE Has The Power To Make Things Float In Thin Air

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© Oliverio
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Reunited In The Eternal Cathouse

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Eleanor G. CarPeo     +    Larry R. CarPeo
© Oliverio
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Wednesday, July 26, 2023

Why I Miss ROCKY POINT ... [Reason #101]

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***   © Oliverio ©    ***
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The Cartoon Character's Nightmare (Comic Relief #5161)

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GARY LARSON
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Tuesday, July 25, 2023

Mrs. Miniver's Alternate Career

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If 
had not been such a great actress,
she could have had a career 
as a model for 
like the one below

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Off The Wall (Comic Relief #5159)

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WILEY MILLER
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Monday, July 24, 2023

Scrabble On The Beach With A "Seven Letter Word"

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The word may be "illegal"
because it is 
a proper name 
but that's okay
because
is one of my favorite artists
© Oliverio
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Sunday, July 23, 2023

Hypothetically ... I May Become The Anti-Christ Of SAG-AFTRA

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Hypothectically,
my name is 
JOHN LOVZIT
and my profession
is making people laugh

My credentials
—hypothetically unlinkable—
are too numerous
to have any truck with
humility

However,
at this time
I need to speak
in percentages

I have more wealth 
than 89.3 percent
of American citizens

Presently,
I can be seen on TV
—Monday through Friday—
and the show's name 
rhymes with
"Money You Should Task"
and the show is produced by
one of my best friends
whose code name is
"Bryan Allen"
 
He has more money 
than 96.3 percent
of Amercan citizens
BUT
he has earned every penny
beginning with being
the youngest stand-up comic
to appear on 
The Tonight Show
with Johnny Carson
 
When I appeared 
on that show,
I was a pathological liar
—an undeniable comedic fact—
but Oliverio is too chickenshit
to provide any 
hyperlinks
on this page
 
Anyone who successfully
makes a living 
in telling jokes
is said to be
"naturally funny"
 
But the amount 
of hard work
required to reach
that status
is immeasureable
as was the rejection
of bad jokes told
—or jokes told badly—
 
On average,
we are wealthier than
81.6 percent
of the general population
 
If people like Bryan Allen
make more money
from our humor
than we do
It is none 
of our damn business
to deny them
 
In other words,
the SAG-AFTRA unions
demanding more money
need to be content
with what
they already have
 
Which is
—on average—
higher than 
80.6 percent 
of the general population
 
Most of whom 
work at jobs
significantly less satisfying
than anything
to do with
show business 
 
 ***
 
© PAUL OLIVERIO © 
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A Quatrain Entitled MINE KAMPF ... Sic Sic Sic

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What's mine is mine
and what's yours is mine
but if you smile
you can keep it for a while
***
 
© HOODA HELAMI ©
Alter Ego #142857
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Saturday, July 22, 2023

The Flower Differential

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A wedding is just like a funeral
except you get to smell
your own flowers
***
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Friday, July 21, 2023

I Wish I Were In Love Again ... Rest In Peace, Mr. Bennedetto

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was written by 
Lorenz Hart + Richard Rogers
 
Though it has many competitors,
it is my favorite song
sung by 
b: August 3, 1926
d: July 21, 2023
 :::
 
 
Two statements before closing
this page
 
1
Tony Bennett:
Thank you for existing
 
2
Your song commences with
a deleteable advert 
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A New Movie ... A New Hairdo ... A New Lover

________________________________________________________________________________________________

 
 
It is no secret that
 
But a hidden camera
recently photographed her
in the 
in Long Beach, CA
on 7/20/23

She has a new hairdo
(with a scissor always within reach)

Wrought with irony,
wrought iron and stucco,
there is a modicum
of militant sadness
in her eyes
as she mourns
the passing
of Larry CarPeo
 
BUT
she is in the presence
of her new lover,
Nicky the Gnome
 
If our lawyers permit,
more information
about BARBIE's new rendezvous
will be posted
on this or
a subsequent page
***
 
© PAUL OLIVERIO © 
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Thursday, July 20, 2023

A Sonnet For Larry R. CarPeo

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When your heart
is flying at half-mast
and the future
has been passed
 
Every light flashes
when reduced
to ashes
 
And it is your turn
to be placed
in an urn
 
No more cash or carry
but we'll always
love you
Larry
***
 
© Carol + Paul CarPeo © 
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Wednesday, July 19, 2023

Aerial View Of ... Friendship Beach ... Rocky Point, NY 11778

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The red dots in the image below
indicate the Oliverio summer home
and the distance to the beach.

At least one thousand times
—beginning in the year 1958—
I have walked that distance
to enjoy the ground level delights
of this photograph
 
If the number written literally
in the previous paragraph
was multiplied by itself,
you would have an idea
of how many memories
I associate 
with everything 
you see below
 
But I will not bore you
with any of them
at this time
 
All I will do is say
Thank you, Nicholas
for the send
 
He did so this morning
within minutes
of my requesting
an image of 
Friendship Beach
 
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The Timeless Words Of JOHN DOS PASSOS

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America
our nation has been 
beaten by strangers
who have turned 
our language
inside out
who have taken
the clean words
our fathers spoke
and made them
slimy and foul
***

JOHN DOS PASSOS
(1936)
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Page Two Of Two: Poetry In 28 Lines + 28 Words

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Page One Of Two: 7/19/23 Spelling Bee

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You start with a honeycomb,
highlighting a central letter

Tradition in the CarPeo household
is Mr. C finds enough words
(usually before 6AM)
to be within easy reach of
"Genius"

Then,
in the course of the day,
Mrs. C finds enough
other words
to warrant that status

But today
—7/19/23—
she achieved "Genius"
before 7AM

The reason this pair of pages exist
is because Page Two
lists  the 28 words
we found
and 
the beauty of today's list
is that 
the recital of the words
per se
is that the sum
of the parts
(so to speak)
is a POEM
 
This is true
simply because
language
per se
is a truly
beautiful thing
 
Unfortunately,
the bottom margin
of this page is problematic

Here is today's honeycomb:

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Tuesday, July 18, 2023

Historically-Based Hypothesis Rhyming With Bagels And Lox

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If you accent the positive
and ignore the negative,
you'll end up 
dumber than
a box of rocks
 
© PAUL OLIVERIO ©
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Have A Seat ... Have A View

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With a barely visible
© Photoverio #687.5
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Photoverio #687: Curvature + Reflection

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© Oliverio
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A Collage For Larry's Mother

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To say that 
is the most talented 
baseball player
in the game today
is to belabor
the obvious


Unfortunately,
he is too good
to continue playing
for the team 
capable of
emotional mood swings
in this blogger
who
[quite stupidly]
has rooted for them
above all other
professional sports teams
for the past forty years

But Mrs. CarPeo
loves Shohei
more than God intended
and my only hope
is that she wears
her Otani t-shirt
to Larry's memorial service
(or lets me wear it)
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Monday, July 17, 2023

All Other Posts Are Put On Hold

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© Paul + Paula Oliverio ©
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Sunday, July 16, 2023

Misplaced Words In Large Print That Only Get Verse

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The rocks are in the bag
and the money is 
on the hillside

An avalanche of laughter
flew out the window
and fed the birds
 
The naked man
wore a black
velvet suit
 
If not Jesus
call him
Zoot 

He crashed into myself
but refused
to apologize
 
His future 
is hitch-hiking
on Yesterday Boulevard
 
He said Maybe
when all we heard
was frogs croaking

Fat tears were 
the frontman
for a fat joke

A picnic basket
is in his pocket
with the tuna fish

The beer glass
is  a flat dish
with no straw

And I wish
nothing
had an ending

But that 
can never 
be true
***

© PAUL OLIVERIO ©
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Saturday, July 15, 2023

When In Doubt, Knock On Wood Atwood

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The only thing
with crazy people
—the only thing, really—
is to be 
somewhere else
***
 
Most people are good
underneath
if they have a chance
to show their goodness
***

MARGARET ATWOOD
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THE NECESSARY NARRATIVE Of ... DR. JAMES RAFT

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I am Dr. James Raft,
Paul Oliverio's psychoanalyst
and life long friend
 
But I will not
allow friendship 
to interfere with
payment for services 
rendered
 
Paul's preference is to 
describe his age as
 "twice thirty-seven"
 
He lives
on a fixed income
—both comfortably and uncomfortably—
  in Long Beach, California
 
The GodFather of Math Trilogy
presently in
Chapter Seven
has totaled more than 7000 pages
of wit, wisdom, pretension
and jabberwocky
 
Paul's blogs appear to have 
no formal followers
and we both prefer it that way
 
In truth,
my patient is very popular
in Malaysia, 
China and Russia,
where translations are sent 
to European countries
whose writers
then take credit
for what
was created by
Paul Oliverio
 
This generates
enough funding for Paul
to afford
psychoanalysis
 
However,
his page production 
has slowed down
significantly
 
Once upon a time,
Paul Oliverio was
averaging sixty pages monthly
 
A passage of time
 reduced the blogging to 
a constant fifty/monthly
 
However,
 he is presently averaging
barely forty pages monthly

The 2023 Wimbledon 
Tennis Tournament
is partly responsible
for this

But
—more importantly—
his music file
is the greatest deterrent
to his output

The genius of his 
tripled the size
of his music file

Before this happened,
each of approximately
four thousand tracks had been
listened to
AT LEAST
ten times

But the technician added
twice that many tracks
including a ten-pack
of Peggy Lee songs,
endless hours of
the Beatles at BBC,
Gene Pitney singing
an X-rated song
with the Rolling Stones,
virtually every song
ever recorded by
RICHARD BERRY,
who wrote the song
"Louie, Louie"
 
There are also
nearly 200 tracks of
Ella Fitzgerald,
Count Basie
+ Duke Ellington
...
...
And 
an Italian composer
named SPINACHIO VERTIGO
 
Paul Olverio
has "pages-in-development"
regarding the film BLOW-UP
and
the collapsing Tacoma-Narrows Bridge
 
There are also in-progress pages
about
Snoop Dogg, James Garfield,
Mozart's 40th Symphony,
a blues guitarist devotee
of the artist Giotto 
named "Joe Toe,"
Hommel figurines
and the actress
GREER GARSON,
etcetra, etcetra
***
 
If Paul does not
get around 
to posting these pages,
he will no longer afford
to pay his therapist
and
—I fear—
I might soon
be writing Paul Oliverio's
 obituary  
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