Saturday, June 30, 2018

Another Dose Of Paul Anastasio

________________________________________________________________________________________________

There are many ways
to praise
the Everly Brothers
but I will
only give three ways 

The beautiful vocal harmonies

Their major influence
on the Beatles






THREE
They dressed better than
most Presidents of the United States
***
 
Consider the harmony
of their haberdashery:

The perfectly tailored suits
with the crease in the pants' legs
visible in this image

The Everly Brothers'
custom tailor was
Joe Anastasio

Mr. Anastasio's daughter
once asked her son
(then age 10)
if he wanted 
a custom-made suit
from his grandfather
and the boy said
NO

I refuse to mention
the boy's name
on the grounds
that it would
incriminate me
 
________________________________________________________________________________________________
Footnote
The next Beatles' page is
here
________________________________________________________________________________________________
 

Such Days As These I Need A Dose Of Paul Anastasio

________________________________________________________________________________________________

The truck driver from Whitestone had
one more clothing delivery before
his weekend officially began.

Seven bolts of silk and linen
—each weighing about fifty pounds—
were destined for a custom tailor.

The tailor's name was Svachini Sartoria
and his shop was on Minetta Lane
in Greenwich Village.

Svachini Sartoria shared a parking lot
with  Allan Block and was wearing
a white smock when he met the driver
of a 1971 Ford Econoline Van.

The truck driver from Whitestone
—fatigued from a sixty-hour work week—
successfully parked his "truck"
alongside two 1976 Volvos
and a custom painted dumpster.

The date was  July 22, 1977

Unlike three days of this week,
the sweltering summer heat
in Manhattan peaked
below100˚
 
It was 98 degrees Fahrenheit 

After presenting the bill of lading
to Mr. Sartoria, the driver
from Quicksilver Messenger Service
mentioned that his grandfather
had been a custom tailor.

QMS was an eight vehicle operation
based in a garage on 10th Avenue
and W.54th Street

The Ford van was the only vehicle
small enough to not require
commercial license plates.

The Ford van was the only
owner-operated vehicle
in the service of QMS.

The driver's name was Paul
and, on this mid-summer Friday afternoon,
he sweated from head-to-toe.

Mr. Sartoria, though not sartorially splendid
in his white smock, was sweat-free
and totally disinterested in Paul's
family reference.

But when Paul mentioned
his grandfather's name,
Sartoria reacted with suspicion.

"Where wasa his shop?"

"On Fifth Avenue, in the mid-fifties."

"Where did he live?"

"On White Plains Road, in the Bronx."

"Oh my God! Oh my God!
Oh mio dio! Oh mio dio!"

"Is something wrong, sir?"

"No,  abasolutely not:
Joe Anastasio was my mentor.
Are you his middle grandchild?"

"Yes, sir. The third of five."

"Your mother was Grace
 with the green eyes?"

"Hazel, actually."

"You were the only grandchild
Giuseppe never had a picture of."

"Cameras frightened me, Mr. Sartoria."

"He never told me your name
but referred to you as
uno speciale."

"The special one. 
My cousins and sisters
called me Speck."

"What wasa so special abouta you?"

"I hardly ever talked as a child
but did a lot of staring into space.
I wanted to be a priest
because when my Father's brother
became a priest, his family gave him
a new car.

"I thought I'd become a monk
and get a free Mercedes-Benz."

"Giuseppe never did he own a car.
I wasa also his chauffeur."

"So was my Father and my Uncles.
I probably would also
have been his chauffeur
if he hadn't died before
I got my license."

At this point of their conversation,
Paul said no to a glass of wine
because he still had to drive up
to mid-town and across
the Queensboro Bridge
and then some...

He drank Pepsi
while Mr. Sartoria
drank Chianti.

After the second Chianti,
the mentee referred to the mentor
by his Americanized name
and lost all trace of his
Italian accent.

"Joe Anastasio also called you
his lap boy. Why?"

"Because I was one who sat
on his lap after Sunday dinners
and listened to whatever he had to say."

"And what did he say."

"If anyone else was within
hearing distance, he would talk
about Abe Lincoln, his favorite President."

"And if no one else could hear him?"

"He talked about his secret lovers
in Manhattan."

That was when the conversation
ended because Mr. Sartoria
rushed up a flight of stairs and returned
with a black and white photograph
of an angelic young Italian girl.

"I want you to have this.
It is a picture of my sister, Ziela.
Short for Graziela but you can
call her Grace."

"Thank you, Mr. Sartoria
it was an absolute pleasure
to meet you. I will treasure
our conversation and hope to
deliver you some more
bolts of silk. Ciao."

"Goodbye, Speck."

Moments later, Paul drove home
to Whitestone.
 
It was rush hour
on a Friday night in lower Manhattan
but the seventeen-mile drive
to Long Island felt like it lasted
only seventeen minutes,
 with the van's air conditioner
blasting all the way home.

However, before boarding his vehicle,
Paul walked across the parking lot.
With the one hundred dollar tip
Mr. Sartoria had given him,
He bought a pair of  leather sandals
custom-made by Allan Block.

Supposedly, they were the same sandals
purchased by John Sebastion
of the Lovin' Spoonful.

The radio in Paul's van
—apropos the weather—
kept playing the same song.


     
________________________________________________________________________________________________
Footnotes
The second half of the "Paul Anastasio" pages
is  here.
 
The song link that ends Chapter One
of the Paul Anastasio saga is prefaced
by a deletable advert. 
________________________________________________________________________________________________

Friday, June 29, 2018

Photoverio #313: ConCloudulations Are In Order For The Eyes ...

________________________________________________________________________________________________


© Oliverio

ConCLOUDulations
Are In Order For
The Eyes Of The Beholder
________________________________________________________________________________________________


Such Times As These, I Need A Heavy Dose Of Paul Oliverio

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Please do not think for a moment that 
I ever need to believe the world
revolves around
ME

Such a world is something
I would NEVER want
to be a part of

I present this image of images,
ALL of which are related to
The GodFather of Math trilogy


The secret wish of Paul Oliverio
is that he was the photographer
of the two Rolling Stones' images
(ditto for the silhouette of Betty Draper)

If that were true, he would not need
to spend half his life knee deep
in the blogosphere.

Yet, he will take this opportunity
to make a didactic statement
about the Rolling Stones:
NO HUMAN ALIVE
can fully understand
the evolution of the band
without viewing
Charlie is my Darling  

As for the two book images,
Franny and Zooey
has influenced me
in more ways than
I care to count.

One of the minor influences
is syntactical:
I have an off-again
on-again relationship
with the terminal
punctuation mark

The other book
involves two women:
the author and the woman
who did the publicity
for the book.

The former evolved into
Arianna Huffington,
and the latter evolved into
Mrs. CarPeo.

The other images
of the fourth row
are all about Mrs. CarPeo

The only other image
not photographed by myself
or related to my family
is the third image
in the fourth row:
the photographer is
Julia Margaret Cameron 

But the most important woman
in the life of Paul Oliverio
appears immediately
to the left of
the Cameron image:
that is my Mother.

The very same image
of Grace Anastasio Oliverio
is the very last image
(and, by far, the largest)
of the Gofather of Math
website.

Her sister
—my beloved Aunt Betty—
and my sister, Linda
appear at the end
of the second row.

This will be the penultimate
paragraph because I fear
my eyes will get
to moist to mention.

The second  picture
in the top row
is the Whitestone Bridge
and if you have read this far,
you can access ALL
of these images by 
googling for
"Photoverio Whitestone"




 

 
________________________________________________________________________________________________


Thursday, June 28, 2018

I Read The News Today, Oh Boy ... Oy Vey

________________________________________________________________________________________________


If John Lennon
read the news today,
which story from 
his homeland's
THE GUARDIAN  
would interest him?

There may not be
4000 holes in
Blackburn Lankashire
today but the Beatles'
classic song which
entitles this page
has such a funky
acronym, it may 
become another
GoFather sequence


________________________________________________________________________________________________
Footnotes
If  A DAY IN THE LIFE  
does not qualify as classic,
then that word ought to be
removed from the dictionary.

The next GoFather/Beatles page is  here
________________________________________________________________________________________________


Wednesday, June 27, 2018

How To Create A Successful Church In The 21st Century

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Replace the altar
with an ATM machine

________________________________________________________________________________________________


The Difference Between Life And Death

________________________________________________________________________________________________

The last Earthly thing
Michael Katz remembered
was his entire family at his bedside, 
emotionally broken by his imminent
departure from this life.

Included in the family were
Eileen and Walter, the twins.
Both were incommunicado
with siblings and parents
for twenty years.

They had been doing something
in Idaho which included denying
five grandchildren the glorious
and generous luxury of 
waterfront grandparents.

Cancer had claimed Marsha Katz
six months ago.

Michael's wife had been 
second-in-command
to a company with 
eight hundred employees.

Michael's wife had been 
second-in-command
to her husband.

Michael was the Chief Executive Officer
of Katz Kosher Katamaran.

Everyone at his bedside
was emotionally shattered
but he could see right through them all.

The sailboat manufacturer,
whose most elaborate creations
were mostly purchased by Arabic royalty,
saw right through those shattered emotions:
Everyone had nothing but dollar signs
flashing in their eyes.

Michael's last words were
You Goddam sons of bitches.
********

This is the first thing Michael Katz saw
in the afterlife:

This is the second thing Michael Katz saw
in the afterlife:




"Call me GK. I am the gate keeper."

"Call me Katz or Katman.
I built sailboats. I..."

"I know all that.
Spare me the salespitch."

"Jesus Christ!
Life after death looks
exactly like life in Long Beach.
I'm going to like it here."

"That depends."

"What do you mean?"

"Life after death looks
exactly like this in both
Heaven and Hell."

"Really?"

"Yes. Really.
They both look exactly like life
on the peninsula of Long Beach."

"But there's got to be
some difference between them,
right?"

"Right but it is very slight.
In Hell, there is no chocolate,
no ice cream, no cheese,
and all confectionery goodies
taste like aluminum foil."

"Which one is for me?
Do I get chocolate
or no chocolate?"

"Well. 
We had to give it some thought."

"Jesus Christ.
What do you mean?"

"Well.
You made a gazillion dollars
off your friends in Saudi Arabia,
Iran, and Lebanon.
But the worldwide image
was that they hated all Jews
and vice versa."

"Jesus Christ, I'm going down.
No chocolate, no cheese,
no future."

"Relax, Katman.
You're going up."

"Thank God."

"Literally.
An also thank Godette."

"Godette?"

"Mrs. God,
so to speak.
She's the one who added
the third dimension
to planet Earth.
The old man preferred
the flatland, two dimensional look."

"Really?"

"Yes,
He wanted it to be a board game.
After creation of the world,
he created a pair of dice."

"Really?"

"Yes,
so now He's really pissed
at her."

"Why?"

"He wanted a board game
but since you've been Trumpified,
it has become an end game."

"Well, GK, I think
I'm going to like it up there."

"It's impossible not to.
Goodbye, Katman."


________________________________________________________________________________________________
Footnotes
THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN
LIFE AND DEATH
is the copyrighted property
of LCSoL.

I would like to thank
Mrs. CarPeo
for greenlighting this page. 
________________________________________________________________________________________________


Tuesday, June 26, 2018

Photoverio #312: She Can't Go On Meeting Like This

________________________________________________________________________________________________


© Oliverio
Chiquita Tschotke:
Sole Survivor of Chillow Costco Debacle
(90755)  
________________________________________________________________________________________________


Jim Morrison Propelled By His Johnson ... Almost A Photoverio

________________________________________________________________________________________________


Between the parentheses of the 425 Salon


This is a 2nd Generation Photograph

That is, I photographed a pre-existing
photographic image

The gravity-defying image
of Jim Morrison
was created by
Jim Coke 

The location of this Street Art
is adjacent to parking lot
at 425 4th St. in Long Beach

Please note:
this parking lot serves
as a campsite for at least
ten homeless people.

None of whom
—quite obviously—
are patrons
of the Salon

________________________________________________________________________________________________
Footnote
The link on
the next Photoverio page
is also a 2nd Generation Photograph
but the artist who created
"Chainsaw Tchotchke"
is a personal friend of mine.
________________________________________________________________________________________________



Monday, June 25, 2018

ONION NEWS Finds Hamburger Creeped Out By Doppelganger

________________________________________________________________________________________________


What else the hamburger
had to say is
here 

________________________________________________________________________________________________


Sunday, June 24, 2018

QUESTION: Was Priny The Poet Descended From Pliny The Elder

________________________________________________________________________________________________

1
A heart stained in anger
grows weak and grows bitter

You become your own prisoner
as you watch yourself sit there

Wrapped up in a trap
of your very own
chain of sorrow



2
I been brought down
to zero, pulled out
and put back there

I sat on a park bench, kissed
the girl with the black hair

And my head shouted down to my heart
"You better look out below!"
***
***
Chain of Sorrow 
***
***

Comparing Priny's poem with
quotes from Pliny the Elder,
the answer to the question
posed in the title of this page
is
Certainly there is no
certainty to the question   


________________________________________________________________________________________________
Footnote
The recital of Mr. Prine's verse
follows an ineradicable advert.
________________________________________________________________________________________________


Saturday, June 23, 2018

Photoverio #311: I Think It Is Beautiful And I Think It Is Ugly ...

________________________________________________________________________________________________

And
I think it is both

© Oliverio 
Adjacent to Mickey D's
 (90802)

________________________________________________________________________________________________


If You Have A Serious Case Of ... UNSANJI

________________________________________________________________________________________________

I learned about "Unsangi"
from a Nigerian friend.

He said it described a behavior
that "brings out the best in people."

Duro (short for Durojaiye) 
told me that when I was on crutches
—after tearing my achilles in 1999—
I was an example of Unsangi.
***

People went out of their way
to hold doors open for me
and let me get to the head
of long lines at restaurants.

The owner of the local tobacco shop
walked out to my car
to deliver cigarets to me
in the parking lot.

Women were much more willing
to talk to me and—I can this because
it was thirteen years before meeting
Mrs. CarPeo—get intimate with me.
***

But I was only on crutches for six months
after which my social invisibility
returned, full blast.

"Not all Unsangi is reversible,"
Duro said, "and some people
are addicted to it, dangerously so."

"But Duro," I said, "if a person's behavior
brings out the best in other people,
where is the danger?"

He hesitated a moment
and furled his eyebrows.
 
"Americans worship the idea
of 'slim and trim.'"

"What's wrong with that?"

"Nothing really, except it can bring out the worst
in other people...mostly out of jealousy.
On the other hand,
Circumfro is the opposite
of slim and trim. It creates Unsanji
because everyone will help
those with damnably large diameter."

"And the bigger the diameter,
the more pressure on the heart
and the greater invitation
to Death...Now I see where the danger is."

"Paul, when the Circumfro has everyone
helping him or her, the Circumfro
regards losing weight as the loss
of stature."

"And the loss of inspiring people
to be on their best behavior."

"The loss of people truly
and automatically helping
someone who is otherwise
a complete stranger to them.
Clinga nobo ra ra dom vliga vle."

"What the hell does that mean?"

"It is a Swahili phrase that means
'Terminal obesity kills the good spirit.'"

"Thank you for the vocabulary lesson,
Duro. Artioats, my friend."

"Artioats?"

"It's a slang twist on Adios.
It means 'Goodbye, my friend.'"

"Thanks for the vocabulary lesson, Paul."

"I owed you one." 
     

________________________________________________________________________________________________
Footnote
IF YOU HAVE A SERIOUS CASE
OF ... UNSANJI
is the copyrighted property of LCSoL.

________________________________________________________________________________________________


He Said ... She Said ... (He/She #54)

________________________________________________________________________________________________

"Last night, I had the strangest realization."

"Isn't that redundant?"

"Isn't what redundant?"

"For you to have a realization...
  is automatically strange."

"Whatever. Anyway, I realized
  that the extant of my hatred
  of you is as essential as
  the realization that it would be
  impossible for me to live
  without you."

"Funny."

"What's so funny about that?"

"I came to the essential conclusion
  that I could live without you
  for as much as one week,
  no longer."

"I think that means we are
  stuck with each other."

"It means more than that...
  It means we are each other."

"Enough said."

"Except for one thing."

"Which is?

"It is impossible to be in love
  without also being in hate."

"Yang cannot exist without Yin."

"So true but now I feel an urge
  for some Sushi."

"Great, I have a coupon, from Groupon."
  
"What do you know, let's go."


________________________________________________________________________________________________
Footnotes
The HE/SHE sequence
is the copyrighted property of LCSoL

This sequence is not linked together
because we want to make our favorite thieves
work for their money
________________________________________________________________________________________________


I Don't Believe ... I Do Believe

________________________________________________________________________________________________

I don't believe in religion
but I do believe
in God

Some say that's contrary
or some similar things

Those are people using words
like so many broken wings

I do not believe in religion
but I do believe
in God

Those words can
take you off-guard
but the idea is
not so hard

I believe both
in God and Godette
naturally
but more important
—I hope—
They believe in me

***
PAUL OLIVERIO


________________________________________________________________________________________________
Footnotes
I DON'T BELIEVE ... I DO BELIEVE
is the copyrighted property of LCSoL

This poem was inspired
by John Prine

The next pure
John Prine page
is
here 
________________________________________________________________________________________________


Prine Time: All His Friends Turned Out To Be Insurance Salesmen

________________________________________________________________________________________________


When you got hell to pay,
put the truth on layaway

Egg and Daughter Nite
(2018)

Forty-seven years ago,
the former mailman
wore an  Illegal Smile 
after a bowl of oatmeal
tried to stare him down 
(and won) and
all his friends turned out
to be insurance salesmen

⬆︎
That is what John Prine
looked like in 1971
but today he looks like
for sage advice
⬇︎
The Age of Forgiveness

John Prine
inspired
the next page  
  
________________________________________________________________________________________________


Friday, June 22, 2018

Poem For A Small Town

________________________________________________________________________________________________

A small town with deep pockets
where all rocks became rockets
birds registered their wings
at the municipal tree

A small town with much pride
every conversation a joy ride
recipes for success
sailed into the sea

A small town with good friends
no one had loose ends
some would be famous
some would just be

A small town with good traction
gestures paved with reaction
foliage had a sense
of history

A small town with no waiting
and no back door dating
everyone kept it
a mystery

***

PAUL OLIVERIO

________________________________________________________________________________________________
Footnotes
POEM FOR A SMALL TOWN
is the copyrighted property of LCSoL

An alternate title for this poem is
10536

The copyrighted photograph
was taken by
Mrs. CarPeo

________________________________________________________________________________________________


Thursday, June 21, 2018

Photoverio #310: Flowers and Shadows

________________________________________________________________________________________________


© Oliverio
Belmont Shore 2015
________________________________________________________________________________________________


A Quote From Saul Bellow About The Nervous Reader

________________________________________________________________________________________________

I am an emotional and nervous reader.
I hold a book up to my face
and it takes only one good sentence
to turn my brain into a volcano.
I begin thinking of everything at once
and a regular lava of thought
pours down my sides.


Henderson The Rain King
________________________________________________________________________________________________


Tuesday, June 19, 2018

The 103rd Bullet: The LLT Trichotomy

________________________________________________________________________________________________


Lust requires little effort.
Love requires great effort.
Trust requires
the greatest effort of all.

________________________________________________________________________________________________
 Footnotes
THE 103rd BULLET 
is the copyrighted property of  LCSoL.
 
Only the first 45 Bullets are linked together
because we do not want to make life easy
for our favorite thieves.
 _______________________________________________________________________________________________