Photoverio #338: Left And Right Reunion

________________________________________________________________________________________________

________________________________________________________________________________________________
Footnote
This trompe-l'oeil was photographed
by Paul Oliverio and is the copyrighted
property of LCSoL
________________________________________________________________________________________________

Photoverio #337: No Place Like Gnome

________________________________________________________________________________________________

© Oliverio
Milan, 2008

________________________________________________________________________________________________

With An Apology To The Pigs (Comic Relief #2486)

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Michael Ramirez

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Ninety Degrees Of Separation

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Alphabetically,

the martial  arts and the marital  arts 

are a two-letter inversion

of each other.

Physically,

they are a ninety-degree rotation

of each other.

Upright

—in the martial arts—

there are two bodies in combat.

 

Horizontally

—in the marital arts—

there are two bodies in communion.

  

The former has one winner.

The latter has two winners

(we hope)

It is the whimsical geometry

of contact sports

(and the alphabet)

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Footnote

Originally written in 1999,

NINETY DEGREES OF SEPARATION

is the copyrighted property of LCSoL

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Photoverio #336: Seduction Scene

________________________________________________________________________________________________

© Oliverio
What a Sharpie!

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Modern Times (Comic Relief #2483)

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Leo Cullum

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Rorschach #24 ... It Makes Me Want To Play Piano

________________________________________________________________________________________________

© Oliverio
If Mike Ambrosia
accepts our piano,
I'll knock 'em dead
with
PINCH RUNNER
ON SECOND BASE
  

The next GoFather/Rorschach
page is
here

_______________________________________________________________________________________________

She'll Do The Cropping And The Carolizing

________________________________________________________________________________________________

If visitors to Yelpsylvania

discover a five-star

reference to

Cafe Ambrosia,

I will attest to its accuracy

Also,
I will do
my own editing
on one of these
images

  

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Another DJ-Verio Playlist ... #142857 ... Staring In The Teacup

________________________________________________________________________________________________

When you wake up in the morning
And can't seem to raise your head
You sit staring in the teacup
At the egg upon your bread
And the life that you are living
Doesn't seem to be quite real
***

DONOVAN 
Only The Blues
(1973)

The link may include
a deletable advert

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Prickly And Tickly, The Choirmaster Proclaims ... [ pST #40]

________________________________________________________________________________________________

© Oliverio
The Evergreen Choir

***

The next 

Superimposed Text page

is
here

The p in the title

stands for

photoverio

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Not Racist: This Is Accurate, Politically Incorrect, (And Funny)

________________________________________________________________________________________________

People I know come up and say:
What color is Vladimir Guerrero?
Is he a black player?

I say,
Come on, he's Dominican.
He's not black.
As African-American players,
we have a theory that baseball
can go get an imitator
and pass them off as us.

It's like they had to get
some kind of dark faces,
so they go to
the Dominican or Venezuela
because you can get them cheaper.

It's like, 
Why should I get this kid
from the South Side of Chicago
and have Scott Boras represent him
and pay him $5 million when you can get
a Dominican guy for a bag of chips?
... I'm telling you, it's sad.

***

TORII HUNTER
(#48)

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Footnotes
This time of year,
all of us pathetic diehard Angels' fans
can do is dream of next year
when Torii Hunter will become
their manager and Vladimir Guerrero
will be their hitting coach

I would like to thank jPeggy
for use of
the teammate image

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Plagiarism, Patriotism And MEgotism Egotism: A Quatrain

________________________________________________________________________________________________

aMErica, aMErica

god shed his grace on ME

and crown my good with sisterhood

from ME to shining ME 

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Footnotes

Katherine Lee Bates

wrote the original America, America

in 1893

Paul Oliverio

gave it a makeover

in 1972

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Multi-Directional

________________________________________________________________________________________________

North, South, East

and the rest

East, West, South

and so forth

South, North, West

and the least

West, East, North

and my mouth

Will now rest
will not move forth
will move the least

Will  I wash my mouth?

***

PAUL OLIVERIO

 

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Footnote

MULTI-DIRECTIONAL

is the copyrighted property

of LCSoL

________________________________________________________________________________________________

One Of My All-Time Favorite Wogging Moments

________________________________________________________________________________________________

I called it wogging

because it was

a mixture of

walking and jogging

Anyway,

during a good portion

of my Jefferson HS days,

I wogged five miles

before the school day began

One particular morning,

(approximately 5AM)

I am about to cross

Buena Vista Street

at Verdugo Avenue,

but the light was red

and  a Burbank Police car

was about the cross

the same intersection.

So I jogged in place,

nodding to the officer.

But he  revved his engine

and went through

the red light,

giving me a thumbs up

while he did so.

Therefore, I jogged through

a red light

with permission

from a cop.
 

One block later,

I had to stop jogging

and begin walking

because I was

laughing so hard

One week later,
the same cop stopped me
for driving through
a red light

I reminded him
of our Buena Vista
encounter:

He gave me a high five
instead of a ticket

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Photoverio #335: Another Thing About Those Woggers + Bikers

________________________________________________________________________________________________

ANYONE

who has ever

walked or jogged

or bicycled

from the Queen Mary

to the mainland

ALSO
KNOWS

this image
(though not in Black+White)

⬇︎

© Oliverio
Walking with the King 

________________________________________________________________________________________________

I Read ART DAILY, Therefore I Now Know Of Lotte Laserstein

________________________________________________________________________________________________

I read

today's ART DAILY

and
discovered another artist:

LOTTE LASERSTEIN

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Anyone Who Has Ever Wogged Or Biked From QM To Mainland

________________________________________________________________________________________________

ANYONE

who has ever

walked or jogged

or bicycled

from the Queen Mary

to the mainland

KNOWS

this image

⬇︎

© Oliverio
PhotoVerio #334.5

 _______________________________________________________________________________________________

In August 2016, We Drove 2000 Miles Along I-40 From X To Y

________________________________________________________________________________________________

After driving 800 miles

from New York

to North Carolina,

we drove 2000 miles

along Interstate 40

For every mile,
there is a mileage marker.

At every marker,
a photograph was taken.

≈ Two thousand photographs ≈
were statistically blended
and bleached
to produce
an average image
of the road

The average image
of the interstate
looks like this
⬇︎

It is a good thing
that trees do not vote
because no politician
would ever win

Trees outnumber humans
by at least 
five to one

If trees could vote,
the Rocky Mountains
would be President
or maybe
the Louisiana Bayou

Maybe it is not
a good thing
that trees cannot vote 
 

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Footnote
The second image
and all of the text
are the copyrighted property
of LCSoL

________________________________________________________________________________________________

It Is All A Matter Of What The Eyes Can See

________________________________________________________________________________________________

When there is a mountain

you cannot climb,

close your eyes

 and

imagine it to be

a molehill

Then

just step on it

and
open your eyes

but

ignore the mountain

***

PAUL OLIVERIO

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Footnote

IT IS ALL A MATTER

OF WHAT THE EYES CAN SEE

is the copyrighted property

of LCSoL

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Photoverio #334: Existential Without Authority

________________________________________________________________________________________________

I exist
therefore
I am

BUT

 

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Footnote.
Both image and text
authored by Oliverio

The image is a garage sign
on Cerritos Avenue
just above Ocean Blvd

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Photoverio #333: This Beach Is For The Birds

________________________________________________________________________________________________

© Oliverio
Peninsula, 2013

________________________________________________________________________________________________

The Circle Game And The Mirror

________________________________________________________________________________________________

When your social circle

has a radius of none,

there is always the one

better known as

YOU

 

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Footnotes

 THE CIRCLE GAME

AND THE MIRROR

is the copyrighted property

of LCSoL

Half of the title
comes from
this song

A rejected  title for this page was
Audience = Performer = 1 

________________________________________________________________________________________________

She Will Tell You ... A Poem By Whatever My Name Is

________________________________________________________________________________________________

She will tell you

the sky is orange

and convince you

to 

not think otherwise

Once you are convinced,

she will  tell you

the sun is owned by Disney

"The sun does not set.

It undergoes nightly adjustments."

You will awaken

the next morning,

thanking God

the sun has risen

exactly the same

as it has done

every day of your life

But then you will have doubts

Maybe you should be

thanking Disney

***

PAUL OLIVERIO

     

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Footnote

SHE WILL TELL YOU

is the copyrighted property of LCSoL

________________________________________________________________________________________________

They Called Him Neverstu

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Stewart Buckley was nicknamed

Neverstu

but the last syllable had nothing

to do

with the name Stewart

Neverstu was a gluing of two words:

the second of which

was missing a syllable

Stewart Buckley was  Never Stupid

 

He worked for a think tank called

Brains 'R Us

an affiliate of  Toys 'R Us


Think tanks like Brains 'R Us

are hired by governments or corporations

for very large sums of money

because they developed ideas

that mere mortals are incapable

of ever thinking

Stewart Buckley's intelligence

was a 24/7 concept

He used logic like a flannel blanket

Complex ideas were reduced to

soft and warm words

when explained by

Stewart Buckley

But when Toys R' Us went bankrupt,

the extraordinarily lucrative

Brains R' Us had the option

to survive independently

or dissolve its resources

It chose the latter and Stewart Buckley

—with immeasurable wealth—

retired at the age of forty-nine

When the company celebrated

his forty-eighth birthday

at the Waldorf-Astoria

on Park Avenue,

his colleagues surreptitiously

began plans to honor

Stewart's Big 5-0

They intended to rent a hotel

in Tahiti, occupied by no one

but employees of Brains R' Us

and serviced exclusively

by the beautiful natives

Gauguin made famous

But Brains R' Us

was a thing of the past

by the time

Stewart Buckley

became

a fifty year-old

***

It wasn't until three days

after that landmark birthday

that Stewart realized

he was no longer

forty-nine years-old

He had been completely absorbed

in a postcard he received from AARP

He memorized it word-for word

and was utterly engrossed

by the special benefits

afforded those who

qualified for the

Association of American

Retired People

When he realized his birthday

had passed, he wanted to call

his girlfriend but he could not

remember her phone number

Nor could he remember the times table

or anything that involved

the smallest degree

of intelligence

However, he did always know

what time Dr. Phil

aired on his TV,

which took up

an entire wall

in his home

Stewart Buckley did not

believe in God but

was deathly afraid of Him

He believed in Dr. Phil

who was broadcast life-size

on the wall that Stewart

occasionally walked into

with gusto

That explains why Stewart's nose

was flattened and why

he walked around

knock-kneed

He felt the same way

about Rachel Maddow

and Sean Hannity

Polar opposites

those two newscasters might be

but they fulfilled all thoughts

that might have evolved

in the days when

Stewart was never stupid

Stewart's lips were bloated
from trying to kiss
Rachel Maddow
and his hand swelled
from high-fiving
Sean Hannity

The danger of being intelligent 24/7

is the reciprocal moment

when the same thing happens

to ignorance

 

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Footnotes

THEY CALL HIM NEVERSTU

is the copyrighted property of LCSoL

We would like to thank

Tim Buckley

for use of his surname

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Photoverio #332: Red Hibbly Grows Two Horns Then Visits Rome

________________________________________________________________________________________________

© Oliverio
The Dream of a Poorly
Photographed Red Hibiscus 

________________________________________________________________________________________________

The 107th Bullet: Regarding The Ubiquitous THEY

________________________________________________________________________________________________

When you don't get
what you want,
you might as well want
what they give you

________________________________________________________________________________________________

 Footnotes

THE 107th BULLET 
is the copyrighted property of  LCSoL.
 
Only the first 45 Bullets are linked together
because we do not want to make life easy
for our favorite thieves. 
 _______________________________________________________________________________________________

The 107th Bullet: Three Sees, Two Wants, One Do And One Do Not

________________________________________________________________________________________________

When you do not see
what you want to see,
it is best to want
what you do see

________________________________________________________________________________________________

 Footnotes

THE 107th BULLET 
is the copyrighted property of  LCSoL.
 
Only the first 45 Bullets are linked together
because we do not want to make life easy
for our favorite thieves.

But I will link you to
the second half of
this page 
 _______________________________________________________________________________________________

Photoverio #332: Is That Her Cigaret Butt On The Sidewalk?

________________________________________________________________________________________________

© Oliverio 
45th Street Above Madison
(2015) 

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Photoverio #331: Hibby From The Top And Hibby From The Side

________________________________________________________________________________________________

© Oliverio (2x)
Mrs. CarPeo, Art Director

________________________________________________________________________________________________

To Be Deleted As Soon As Possible

________________________________________________________________________________________________

I don't care
if the pictures stay
on this page
but that goddam beer gut
has to go

So I must say
1000 times:

I hate chocolate
I hate cheese 
I hate beer

I hate chocolate
I hate cheese 
I hate beer
***
***

I hate chocolate
I hate cheese 
I hate beer 
***
***
I hate chocolate
I hate cheese 
I hate beer
***
***

I hate chocolate
I hate cheese 
I hate beer 
 ***
***
I hate chocolate
I hate cheese 
I hate beer
 ***
**********
***
***
***

I hate chocolate
I hate cheese 
I hate beer 
I hate chocolate
I hate cheese 
I hate beer

  

________________________________________________________________________________________________

The 106th Bullet: The Matrimony Of Nothingness

________________________________________________________________________________________________

The King of Nothing
will not have to do anything
after finding
the Queen of Nothing

________________________________________________________________________________________________

 Footnotes

THE 106th BULLET 
is the copyrighted property of  LCSoL.
 
Only the first 45 Bullets are linked together
because we do not want to make life easy
for our favorite thieves.

This bullet evolved from a conversation
this morning after which I was informed
that there exists a song
about the King of Nothing.

If you want to hear it,
click here. 

But, of course,
the song begins with
a deletable advert.
 _______________________________________________________________________________________________

A Pic To Be Picked Up By Queen Yelpia

________________________________________________________________________________________________

The grandeur of this still-life
is in the peppers whose wrinkles
would disqualify them
from professional
vegetable photo-sessions.
 
The dimpled eggplant
with flattened skin
and aged stem
would be trashed
by most photographers.
 
The apple, defiantly,
wears a label sticker.

It could have been
a very expensive dress
worn by a woman
obligated to show off
the label.

That happens in the real world.

This is not a photograph
of shiny, ebullient, seductive
vegetables and fruits,
accompanied by 
a mealy-mouthed foodie.

But I can guarantee you
that the resultant dish
created by Queen Yelpia
will have your taste buds
pirouetting with joy.

________________________________________________________________________________________________

CarPeo Set Piece #81: The G-Spot And The Tall Nineteen

________________________________________________________________________________________________

© Mrs. CarPeo 
A Set Piece on Steroids

The next
CarPeo Set Piece is
here

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Joan Didion Quoted Someone Else About ... Betting Odds

________________________________________________________________________________________________

If you’re capable of being
glib and verbal,
the odds are you have
no idea what you’re talking about
but it sounds good,
whereas if you know
a great deal of what you’re saying
the odds are you can’t get
on a talk show because
nobody can understand you

***

C.P. SNOW

quoted by Joan Didion

in

POLITICAL FICTIONS

  

________________________________________________________________________________________________

A Poem From China That Could Have Been Written Anywhere

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Last year you went
with your troops

to Tibet.

And when your men
had vanished

beyond the city-wall, 

news was cut off

between the two worlds

as between

the living and the dead.
 

No one has come upon

a faithful horse guarding

a  crumpled tent or torn flag,

or any trace of you.
 

If only I knew,

I might serve you
in the temple, 

instead of these tears

toward the far sky.

***

ZHANG JI

Thinking of a Friend
  Lost in the Tibetan War    

________________________________________________________________________________________________