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SAFE AND HEALTHY
NEW YEAR
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Thursday, December 31, 2020
Wednesday, December 30, 2020
Photoverio #519: A Rose By Any Other Name ...
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Would smell as sweet
 |
| So I will call this rose ELEANOR |
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Tuesday, December 29, 2020
The Danger Of Mental Equilibrium
_______________________________________________________________________________________________
Those whose mental equilibrium
is undisturbed
should henceforth be treated
as probably pathological
***
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Friday, December 25, 2020
Acrostic Greetings From The CarPeos ... ©©©
________________________________________________________________________________________________
May
Everyone
Rejoice and enjoy
Rewards on this
Yuletide
Consorting in
Heaven, there is a
Royal choir—
In harmony and
Swing with rhythm.
Today, on this Holy Day,
Magnificent angels
Are all
Singing
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A Shorthand But Necessary Christmas Greeting
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 |
| Diagonal Crucifixes ??? |
________________________________________________________________________________________________
Tight End, Loose Lips, Catcher, The Missionary ... For Example
________________________________________________________________________________________________
All poetry is positional:
to try to express one's position
in regard to the universe
embraced by consciousness
***
VLADIMIR NABOKOV
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Thursday, December 24, 2020
DAVID BOROWITZ + The Last Letter From Our First Queen
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 |
| BOROWITZ REPORT EXCLUSIVE |
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👮 ... If I Didn't Have To Spend Money On Uncle TAXi ... 👮
________________________________________________________________________________________________
My girlfriend
would love me for
the Forty Days of Christmas
If I gave her
a total of forty $100 gifts
However,
Uncle TAXi
will not allow
that to happen
Because
I have to give HIM
the equivalent of
forty-five $100 gifts
My uncle's full name
is
PROPERTi TAXi
and he is full of power
over homeowners
like me
Without Uncle TAXi
and his kin,
Uncle Sam would have
empty pockets
If I ignored Uncle TAXi,
he could padlock me
out of home and hearth
👮
👮
But he is considerate enough
to accept half-payment
in December
and the other half
in March
© PAUL OLIVERIO
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How To Look At The Year We've All Been Waiting For
________________________________________________________________________________________________
HELLO 2021
GOODBYE 2020
 |
| NYTvision |
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Monday, December 21, 2020
If I Were A Performance Artist ...
_______________________________________________________________________________________________
This would NOT be
a sad and blurry
photograph of
It would be a magnificent space
for my performance art
_______________________________________________________________________________________________
The Raspberry Statement ... Divorce Lawyers' Nightmare
________________________________________________________________________________________________
In their 2019 Spring Quarterly Journal,
The Institute of Inane Research
titled an article
PARENTS SAY GOODBYE
TO VERBAL VOLCANOS
The original title
of this decade-long study was
Seismic Activity
Does Not Belong
In The Home
***
The subjects of this research
were families with children
between the ages
of four and fourteen
Criteria required both parents
to have jobs outside
the household
Each parent had to have
personal "volatility levels"
of 5.5
That is, they were prone
to aggressively loud arguments
at the dinner table
and elsewhere
in the presence
of their offspring
Each family had to be
amenable to counseling
especially if any
of their children
were already in therapy
Participating parents
were given very simple instructions:
Anytime the urge to argue
inspired either one of them,
"identifiable words"
in the English language
could not be used
They were to be replaced
by pure nonsense syllables
punctuated by flatulent sounds
Just imagine
scat singing morphing
into fart sounds
without the aroma
The volume of this
nonsensical communication
was unlimited
but all such "arguments"
ended with both parents
laughing hysterically
and creating
a family hug-fest
The primary concern
of the Institute
was the mental health
of children
who witnessed this
"transformative parental behavior"
If there was a measuring stick
for WELLNESS,
all the children
of 5.5 Volatility Level parents
went from the low end
to the high end
in the course of a ten-year study
Physical appearance,
academic performance,
and sociability skills
improved dramatically
despite whimsical urges
to scat sing until
everyone around them
chimed in
With very few exceptions,
all "transformationalized"
children
became big fans of
In rare instances,
some of these children
became authorities
on fart jokes
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Sunday, December 20, 2020
Conundrum
________________________________________________________________________________________________
I wanted a day
devoid of thought
but I did not know
what to think
Mission accomplished
***
________________________________________________________________________________________________
Saturday, December 19, 2020
A Bullet-Laden Suggestion For Your Daily Dose Of Satire
________________________________________________________________________________________________
Dr. Fauci says that
- survive coronavirus briefings.
- Scientists say
- that Earth is endangered
- by a new strain of fact-resistant humans.
- Obama proposes
- cancelling cable at the White House
- to get Trump to leave.
- Ivanka Trump
- applies for the job
- of daughter to Joe Biden.
- Queen Elizabeth II offers
- to restore British rule
- over the United States.
- Putin warns that the U.S.
- will be controlled
- by Americans.
- Get the Borowitz Report
- in your in-box.
- Sign up for the newsletter.
________________________________________________________________________________________________
Friday, December 18, 2020
Upstate NY, 12/17/20: Stunningly Beautiful From 3000 Miles Away
________________________________________________________________________________________________
 |
| But I wouldn't want to shovel it (or dress for it) |
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#49: The Leaning Tower Of STREET ART UTOPIA
________________________________________________________________________________________________
 |
| Artist n/a |
The next Street Art page
is here
________________________________________________________________________________________________
Worth Multiple Readings To Approximate Understanding
________________________________________________________________________________________________
 |
| O HENRY |
Thursday, December 17, 2020
A Court Jester Quote About Her Mother
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 |
| JUDY TENUTA |
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Wednesday, December 16, 2020
Exponential Logic Of Right And Wrong (Comic Relief #3606)
________________________________________________________________________________________________
 |
| GARY LARSON |
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Monday, December 14, 2020
To Make A Quatrain Sestet ... Number Thirty-Nine
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To make a sestet using
a cliche from
The Book Divine
Those who pontificate
believe they are casting
pearls before swine
________________________________________________________________________________________________
Footnotes
TO MAKE A QUATRAIN
...
...
[or any of its variants]
is the copyrighted property
of LCSoL
"The Book Divine"
refers to
Some italic couplets
were originally written
in the 20th Century
and copyrighted
under the title
The Neither/Nor Journal
The next page
in this series
is here
were originally written
in the 20th Century
and copyrighted
under the title
The Neither/Nor Journal
The next page
in this series
is here
________________________________________________________________________________________________
Sunday, December 13, 2020
He Predicted The Q-Anons + The Proud Boys + The Trumpettes
________________________________________________________________________________________________
Too many people enjoy
an extended vacation
from evidence
***
(1892-1970)
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A Hungry Shopper In The Baking Aisle
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MOUSE IN THE GROCERY
 |
| HENRI COLE |
Friday, December 11, 2020
Dream Bridge Revisited By A Someone From The Class Of '61
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Gratitude from Public School 193
 |
| But shouldn't they ALL be wearing masks? |
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The Sacred Black Circle (Comic Relief #3600)
________________________________________________________________________________________________
 |
| JULIA LEIGH + PHILLIP DAY |
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Once Upon A Time, There Was America ... Add Your Own Image
________________________________________________________________________________________________
Once Upon A Time, There Was America
not North America
not South America
but the
United States of America
Where people only wore masks
on Halloween
or at costume parties
Once upon a Time
***
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Wednesday, December 9, 2020
Random Acts Of Helplessness
_______________________________________________________________________________________________
he stumbled across the street
then he fell on the sidewalk
he got up
and stared at the sun
proudly
he walked one block
then fell again
and crawled
into a doorway
people walked by
and gawked
when they saw him
then random people
walked by
and ignored him
he may still
be there
but I can't
see him from here
***
© PAUL OLIVERIO
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The PANDOLFINI Commandments For Chess ...
________________________________________________________________________________________________
 |
| Dedicated to the Raging Rooks of Harlem |
Photoverio #518: Defying Gravity
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 |
| © Oliverio |
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Tuesday, December 8, 2020
On The Astaire Way To Heaven 👉What A Concept 👈
________________________________________________________________________________________________
We can all be
 |
| © Oliverio |
IF...The Whole World Was Bleached Of Color ... THEN ...
________________________________________________________________________________________________
Everywhere you looked,
it would feel like
you were in
an Art Museum
 |
| © Oliverio |
and there would be
no discrimination against
people of color
________________________________________________________________________________________________
The I. I. R. Discovers Sigmund Freud's Brother Alan
_______________________________________________________________________________________________
Many things have been said
about Sigmund Freud and they
will continue to be said
but what is not said
by anyone outside of
The Institute of Inane Research
is that the Godfather of Psychoanalysis
was a terrible speller.
😥
In the afterlife, it so happened
his brother but the man's surname
was not Freud but Freed.
Mr. Freed's first name is Alan.
The two gentlemen, after gut laughing
at what Freud called "mispellopia,"
became the best of friends
and would always greet
each other with the words
Rama Lama Ding Dong
Brother Mother Ping Pong
asked Sigmund Freud
what he thought of the world
in the year 2020:
As a psychoanalyst,
they threw me under the bus
because I said everything relates to
either the Sex Wish or the Death Wish.
The year 2020 proved them wrong:
COVID-19 is all about the Death Wish
and it is the most unifying thing
in the world.
News about COVID is a 24/7
occupation of most people.
As for the Sex Wish, three words
that reverberate around the world are
BLACK LIVES MATTER
but an equal truth is...
the black Penis rules!
***
© PAUL OLIVERIO
and Happy Holidays
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Monday, December 7, 2020
Eduardo Hooperez: Please Call 718-779-0290 For An Art Project
________________________________________________________________________________________________
Eduardo, please call the owner
of this 21st Century NIGHTHAWKS DINER
to promote his restaurant
by updating
Edward Hopper's classic painting
________________________________________________________________________________________________
Photoverio #517: Refrigerator Magnet Blues Band
________________________________________________________________________________________________
Rockin' In The Rocks
 |
| © Oliverio |
Bleached Blues with Semi-Sombrero
________________________________________________________________________________________________
Photoverio #516: Seasons Greetings ... Ethnically + Fast Foodily
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Feliz Navidad para Tamales
 |
| © Oliverio |
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Saturday, December 5, 2020
Photoverio #515: A Red Light District
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 |
| © Oliverio |
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Yin Versus Yang ... And The Winner Is ...
________________________________________________________________________________________________
My cats had
a sleeping contest
and I was the winner
or I am still sleeping
and more obviously
the winner.
Tomorrow,
they will have to
feed me
________________________________________________________________________________________________
Footnote
YIN VERSUS YANG ... AND THE WINNER IS ...
is the copyrighted property of LCSoL ________________________________________________________________________________________________
Friday, December 4, 2020
In 1964: What American Rolling Stones' Fans Did NOT See
________________________________________________________________________________________________
The British release of
the Rolling Stones' first album
was wordless except for
the word Decca
(the recording company)
The British liner notes
contained a controversial
statement which was deleted
from the American liner notes
Both the controversial statement
and the wordless cover were
the brainstorm of their manager,
Hot off the press, the album
was a big hit on both sides of the pond
The Rolling Stones'
debut album officially
became known as
________________________________________________________________________________________________
BANKSY Can Take It To The Bank ... The Monet Miasma
________________________________________________________________________________________________
 |
| Is Monet crying in his grave? ... Nope, I bet he's laughing |
________________________________________________________________________________________________
Hallucinatory Logic (Comic Relief #3586)
________________________________________________________________________________________________
 |
| ADAM DOUGLAS THOMPSON |
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Set 'Em Up, Joe ...A Most Profound Quote From The Barr Man
_______________________________________________________________________________________________
Even the Greatest Liars
slip and tell the Truth
Sometimes
 |
| DAVID BOROWITZ |
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The Twilight Zone, Alfred Hitchcock And Me ME Tv
________________________________________________________________________________________________
Maybe the most
entertaining channel
on television
for Me
and YOU
 |
| Me TV |
_______________________________________________________________________________________________
This Is Not A Drawbridge ... It Is A DREAM BRIDGE
________________________________________________________________________________________________
But if it could be
one million and one
memories
would pop out
of this suspension bridge.
I grew up
I walked on this bridge thirty times.
All but three
involved a shortcut
—across its width—
to a Catholic Church
My thinking was
if I get run over and die
on the way to or from
Sunday Mass
that would be
an Easy Pass
to the Promised Land
The Whitestone Bridge is viewed
from the continent of North America
and this exact image appears
in the opening credits of BECKER,
starring Ted Danson
I lived two blocks away from the bridge
on the unseen side of this suspension
which is that thing called Long Island
whose western end is fronted by
the East River
The park adjacent to the bridge
is named for one of our Founding Fathers:
but everyone called it Whitestone Park.
It is where I smoked my first cigaret
a jazillion years ago,
give or take
a few jaz.
Maybe I should be
reduced to a mound of salt
because I have
inundated these pages
with Whitestone Park
and Whitestone Bridge memories
talking to my mother and father
and sister Linda
All of whom are laughing their asses off
in the Promised Land.
***
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