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Mr. Bauer was my 6th grade teacher
at PS 193 in Whitestone, NY
Except for PE
(Physical Education)
better known as "Gym,"
he taught us everything.
I learned how to play soprano recorder
from Mr. Bauer.
As a result of this,
I learned how to play
piano.
Thanks to Mr. B,
I became a great admirer
of the greatest books
written in alphabetical order:
dictionaries and encyclopedias.
But he sucked as a Math teacher
and my laser-beamed
Italian brown eyes
occasionally told him as much.
It reached a point
where Mr. Bauer would whisper
in my ear
—before the Math lesson began—
Paul, you look like
you need to use the bathroom.
In fact,
I had no such need
but welcomed the opportunity
to leave the classroom.
The first time he whispered
and I wandered,
I returned after two minutes
but he signaled from his desk
to wander some more.
I always loved books
except for the part about
reading them.
So I went to the library
which was half the size
of the boy's room.
The year was 1961.
That is when I met Paul Stenack.
The library cubicle
was entirely his.
He quickly realized
that I had little to say
but was a very good listener.
He mostly talked about two books:
War of the Worlds
and
The Invisible Man
The next school bell
would ring,
indicating lunch time.
Paul Stenach always talked
about Science Fiction
in such a detailed
and articulate way
that it scared
the beJesus out of me.
But I continued hanging out
with Paul because
the terror also excited me.
The lasting effect of those
library cubicle encounters
was that I refused to read
any science fiction
until I was a college student
and card-carrying member
of the Hippie Movement.
Kurt Vonnegut
became required reading
and I guzzled virtually every novel
KV ever wrote.
Despite reading Cat's Cradle
and
God Bless You, Mr. Rosewater
a dozen times
—and loving them more
with each reading—
my favorite Vonnegut novel
is devoid of anything
related to science fiction:
MOTHER NIGHT
Anyway,
I did not read anything
by H.G. Wells
until the year 2020:
Fifty-nine years after
his most famous novels
gave me nightmares
!!!
TONO-BUNGAY
is considered Wells'
"most artistic novel"
and "least scientific"
It is considered
the first modern satire
of advertising
written in English.
I just finished the novel,
two hours ago.
If I were to highly recommend
you read the Tono Bungay,
YOU could have me arrested
for understatement.
***
I sincerely wish
Happy Googling
to anyone
who has read this far
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