The Tale Of A Pair O' Lorikeets

________________________________________________________________________________________________

 This is Patricia Lorikeet
 seated on her perch.

 Her boyfriend calls her
 Perchy 

 She sends him a signal:
"It's feeding time, Larry."


 A bowl of nectar
 awaits them.

© Oliverio (2x)

 They meet on
 the feeder's wrist.


 That is Patricia on the left
 and Larry Lorikeet
 on the right

(or it may be 
 the other way around) 







________________________________________________________________________________________________
Footnote
Lorikeets  are parakeets with a degree
from the Fashion Institute of Technology.
________________________________________________________________________________________________

When It Is Easy [HKu #47]

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Everything will be fine
is easy to say
when you have
everything.

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Footnotes

WHEN IT IS EASY
is the copyrighted property of LCSoL

The next GoFather Haiku page is
here

________________________________________________________________________________________________

The Year Was 2005 ... Fats Domino, R.I.P.

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Chicken farms and herds of cows

were everywhere in Keezly, Kentucky

but you had to schlep ten miles 

out to the Higgins Highway

to get a pack of smokes,

if such was your need

at the midnight hour.

On April 24, 2005,
Abner Malone had
such a need.

At that hour,

he might as well have driven

his Volkswagen Beetle

through an inkwell.

But the moment

he reached the highway,

he blasted his car stereo.

Unfortunately for Abner,

a state patrol car was waiting for him

in the 7/11 parking lot.

A Pakistani man,

wearing a 7/11 jersey,

was standing in the doorway.

He referred to the policewomen

as "Soolt and Peppa"

because one was white

and the other was black.

The black officer approached Abner,

citation book in hand.

Abner immediately extinguished

the car stereo.

On Virginia highways,
your radio volume
was unacceptable
and illegal.

Officer, I apologize but

I found my thrill on Blueberry Hill

The officer suppressed a chuckle
and started to write out
a citation.

The other police officer
jumped out of the patrol car


Hey, partner, put that pad away
and you, boy,
turn that radio back on!

Abner did as he was told
but the volume was very low.

The white officer, however,
overcompensated for the low volume:

THE WIND IN THE WILLOW PLAYED
LOVE'S SWEET MELODY

She dragged Abner out of the car
and started dancing with him.

No one was in the 7/11 
but the Pakistani clerk
danced in the parking lot.

He had the rhythm
of a headless chicken.

As loud as her partner,
the black officer sang along
for the last verse

THOUGH WE'RE APART
YOU'RE PART OF ME STILL
FOR YOU WERE MY THRILL
ON BLUEBERRY HILL

When the singing stopped,
the dancing ended.

The car radio was virtually
inaudible. 

The policewomen embraced
and in perfect harmony,
said to Abner
Now go home!

He got back in his car
and did exactly as he was told.

Not until he got there
did Abner realize that
he forgot to buy the cigarets.

But his heart and soul
were one big smile.

And that is how
Abner Malone kicked
the cigaret habit.

He didn't think seriously
about lighting one up
until October 24, 2017.

Ain't That A Shame

That is the day
Fats Domino died. 

Antoine Dominique "Fats" Domino 
born: February 26, 1928
  died: October 24, 2017  

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Footnote
THE YEAR WAS 2005 ... FATS DOMINO, R.I.P.
is the copyrighted property
of the LCSOL

________________________________________________________________________________________________

You Can Almost Believe Mr. Clemens Wrote About This In 2017

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Injun Joe was believed
to have killed five citizens
of the village,
but what of it?

If he had been Satan himself
there would have been plenty
of weaklings ready to scribble 
their names to a pardon petition,
and drip a tear on it
from their permanently impaired
and leaky waterworks.

MARK TWAIN
The Adventures of Tom Sawyer
(1876)

________________________________________________________________________________________________

A Most Important Date In Comedy History ... August 1, 1966

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Merv Griffin introduces

Our Little Richie Pryor

who does a stunning

jazz mime

with an unseen orchestra
 

Richard sits at the desk

with Merv, alongside

the Everly Brothers

And then Richard gets to meet

the man he calls

The God of Comedy

Jerry Lewis proves

that title is,

at best,

a very slight exaggeration

Richard Pryor
tells a great story
about how his father
introduced him
to the wacky world
of Jerry Lewis

When a hot babe
named Dagmar
sits next to Richard,
he needs water
to cool himself off 

And becomes the focal point
of the Water Follies
  
Then the stage becomes
a geyser of gargantuan
slapstick

 Wet and wonderful
insanity ensues
but feel free
to disagree
after watching
at least
the first fifteen
and the last twelve
minutes
of this video

 

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Footnotes
You can go gaga with your google-search
as a result of this page but
there were statements made

challenging the deification

of Jerry Lewis

—Many years after  August 1, 1966—
Johnny Carson repeatedly said
Richard Pryor is the
funniest man
in America

Such statements were,
at best,
a very slight exaggeration 
 

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Paul DJ-iverio Quotes And Spins LYLE LOVETT Song

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Now a small, more ordinary man

might not appreciate the guidance

of a good woman 

who truly loves him

He might drift in despair

during the ignorant

dumbness doings 

of his dirty daily 

existence

Lyle Lovett

My Baby Don't Tolerate

Feel free to go to
Church 
with Mr. Lovett

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Footnotes

The name in the title is pronounced

D-jive-air-e-o

It rhymes with Oliverio 

and Photoverio

But enough about me

The TOLERATE video also features
Joe Ely and John Hiatt,
both of whom are most google-worthy    

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Auguste Rodin And Napolean Bonaparte ... Found In New Jersey

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Rodin + Napolean
** 

A bust of the French emperor
created by the master sculptor
faded into oblivion 
for eighty years
in a New Jersey
town hall only
to be discovered 
by chance*

© Art Daily

*Chance was an art history student

named  Mallory Mortillaro

**Rodin and Napolean are now
on their way to  Philadelphia

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Piffle + Graffiti ... [ pST #28]

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Prelude to the Poundstone Personality Psurvey
(begins at 13:30 of the podcast)
 

The next 

Superimposed Text page

is
TBD

The p in the title

stands for

photoverio

________________________________________________________________________________________________

A Most Important Deleted And Diminshed Alternate Fact Is

________________________________________________________________________________________________

I wrote this verse →

The pie in the sky

has turned to mud cake.

We don't make love,

we make the bed shake.

That verse, in fact,

was written by a Slash Man:

Singer/Song Writer/

Guitarist Extraordinaire/

New York City
bus driver.

His name is

Jack McCarthy

As for me...

all I want for Christmas

is for Mr. McCarthy

to cross paths with

the aforementioned

producer/musician
Joe Henry,

and professionally record

the Greatest Christmas Songs

that no one knows
 

________________________________________________________________________________________________

The Most Important Thought On His Mind Is

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Why is my sister in

The Witness Protection Program 

________________________________________________________________________________________________

So Is Yesterday ... So Is Today ... AND ALSO

________________________________________________________________________________________________

TOMORROW IS OCTOBER

Now that fires have been contained
These ashes are of our own making
Clouds hang up on radio towers
And sirens sing one song for hours
 
Here begins the fitting end
To what we'd started over
When tomorrow is October

A masquerade of civility
Had stood the test of time of me
I kept the faith and hid behind
Whatever parade was cheering mine
 
But circus wheels leave muddy fields
The flowers trampled over
When tomorrow is October

The scrubby hills flash their teeth
All iron will and disbelief
I move to rise, but as soon
Here's that first dark afternoon
 
Cold and golden, cross and scolding
Even angels who lord over
When tomorrow is October

Joe Henry 


________________________________________________________________________________________________
Footnotes
The image of Joe Henry was co-opted from  here.

The immediate need to post this page
was created  there. 

An eye-popping treasure-trove of musical
and literary information about Mr. Henry
can be found  elsewhere.

The last word of the last footnote
on this page is spelt backwards.

Including this one,  four songs written
by Mr. Henry have been recorded
by his better known sister-in-law,
AnnodaM
________________________________________________________________________________________________

The Barefoot Jogger And The One-Legged Man

________________________________________________________________________________________________

The barefoot jogger ran 

along the shore 

then up to the boulevard.
 

A ten mile run ended
in front of the post office

where a one-legged man

leaned against

a lamp post.

The one-legged man
repeated the same sentence
Ten times.

I lost my leg.
 I lost my leg. 

I lost my leg.
...
 
Ten times.

Once for each mile
The barefoot jogger ran.

The barefoot jogger 

reached into the pocket

of his running shorts.

He gave the one-legged man

a sweat-stained

ten dollar bill.
 

One dollar for each mile

the barefoot jogger ran.

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Footnotes

THE BAREFOOT JOGGER

AND THE ONE-LEGGED MAN

is the copyrighted property

of the LCSoL

Originally written in 2009,
this poem was given birth
at the Belmont Shore
post office

________________________________________________________________________________________________

________________________________________________________________________________________________

The 83rd Bullet: If Only The NEW Knew Otherwise

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Each new generation acts as if
they discovered gravity.

Other generations know this
not to be true
but are often too intimidated
to correct them.

________________________________________________________________________________________________

 Footnotes

THE 83nd BULLET  is the copyrighted property of  LCSoL.

Only the first 45 Bullets are linked together
because we do not want to make life easy
for our favorite thieves.

Mrs. CarPeo made this page possible.

It is plausible (and socially acceptable)
to dream about discovering gravity. 
________________________________________________________________________________________________

Photoverio #273: Woman In Water With Snowflakes

________________________________________________________________________________________________

© Oliverio 
At The Aquarium
 (2017)

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Bilingual Commentary ... [ pST #27]

________________________________________________________________________________________________

© Mrs. CarPeo
At The Aquarium
(2017) 

The next 

Superimposed Text page

is
here

The p in the title

stands for

photoverio

________________________________________________________________________________________________

More Quotes From ACKROYD (The Novel, Not the Actor)

________________________________________________________________________________________________

He fits into his mood changes

as if they are custom-made.

Whatever the  emotion

it looks right on him.

That, I suppose,

is a description of class.
*

Most men are unable

to work together

beyond a certain level

of mediocrity...

to exceed that level

is to declare yourself

an enemy of your fellow worker

and therefore an exile,

open to envy, suspicion,

subversion and attack.
*

This is a country
where you can land in the brig

for cigarette smuggling

and get promoted into

the high command for smuggling

weapons to the enemy.
*

Intimidation is modern man's

last viable weapon against being

devoured by his loved ones.
*

"When Warhol paints

it is not to make art

but to make

the cover of Time."

***

Jules Feiffer 

(1977) 
  

________________________________________________________________________________________________

She Is Now In The Witness Protection Program

________________________________________________________________________________________________

After being featured

in a cat food commercial,

Silhouette was placed in the
Federal Witness Protection Program.

© Oliverio

While the commercial

was being filmed,

an assistant camera man
farted.

The director was so angered

by the flatulence,

the camera man

was forced to eat cat food

while crawling across
the floor.

The camera man is suing

a major film studio.

  

Silhouette witnessed

his humiliating experience.

She is now wearing a Victorian collar

with an imbedded detector

to track her every movement.

Much to her chagrin,

Silhouette Sally was briefly sent home 

  from her witness protection paradise,

exactly thirty-three days 

after the program began.

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Not For Public Consumption ... 68 Year Old Boy Does So Declare

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Yesterday, Today And Tomorrow

(Forty Six Years Ago)

****************

A boy dropped out of school.

The next day,

he drank himself
into a stupor.

The next day,

his mother served him

his favorite breakfast.

It was the last meal

she ever cooked

for him.

By midnight,

she was re-united 

with his father

who had died

five days after

his fifty-fifth

birthday.

She was fifty.

The boy had to 

identify her body

at the city morgue.

According to
his driver's license,
the boy was twenty-two.

According to
his poetic license,
he was twelve years old.

He was escorted
to the city morgue
in a flashy sports car
by his estranged 
brother-in-law.

He could not wait
to tell his sister
that her -ex
was now ready
to be her 
un -ex

And that mistake
would ultimately
result in
the next funeral,
four years later

When his sister
was re-united
with her parents.

However,
in 2017,
the boy has no desire
to be re-united
with his
HOLY TRINITY
anytime soon.

All because he has
finally discovered
his better half.

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Written By Zelda Sayre Before She Became Zelda Fitzgerald

________________________________________________________________________________________________

THE ICEBERG
 
Cornelia gazed out of the window and sighed, not because she was particularly unhappy, but because she had mortified her parents and disappointed her friends. Her two sisters, younger than she, were married and established for life long ago; yet here she remained at thirty years of age, like a belated apple or a faded bachelor’s button, either forgotten or not deemed worth the picking. Her father did not scold. He kindly suggested that perhaps Neilie would do more for herself if the rest of the family would leave her alone. Her brother said, “Cornie’s a fine girl and good looking enough, but she’s got no magnetism. A fellow might as well try to tackle an iceberg.” 

For all that, the family cat found her responsive enough, and the little fox-terrier fairly adored her, to say nothing of a blue jay that insisted upon a friendly dispute every time she stole to her retreat in the old-fashioned Southern garden. Her mother said, “Cornelia is not sympathetic. She looks at a man with her thoughts a thousand miles away, and no man’s vanity will stand for that. What good are beautiful clothes and musical genius if humanity is left out? No! No! Cornelia will never marry, Cornelia is my despair.”
 
Now Cornelia sometimes grew weary of disapproval and resented it. “Mother,” she would say, “is marriage the end and aim of life? Is there nothing else on which a woman might spend her energy? Sister Nettie is tied to a clerical man, and, between caring for the baby and making ends meet, looks older than I. Sister Blanche finds so little comfort in a worked-down husband that she has taken to foreign missions and suffrage for diversion. If I’m an economic proposition, I’ll turn to business.”
 
So, without more ado, she secretly took a course at business college, and taught the fingers that had rippled over Chopin and Chaminade to be equally dexterous on the typewriter. Her eyes seemed to grow larger and more luminous as she puzzled over the hieroglyphics of stenography.

“That Miss Holton is a wonder,” said the manager of the college. 

“Yes, she’s a social failure, but she bids fair to be a business success,” agreed a young man who had once fallen into her indifferent keeping.
 
Just then the phone rang. “At once, you say! Wait a moment, I’ll see.” Proceeding softly to her desk, he said, “Miss Holton, I consider you quite efficient as a pupil. Do you care to answer an emergency call? The firm of Gimbel, Brown and Company wishes a stenographer at once. What do you say to the place?”
 
“What do I say? Why, it just hits the spot. Let me get my hat and I’m off.”
“Well,” said the manager, “I do like a girl who knows what she wants.”
 
If her mother could only have heard that! Perhaps, after all, Cornelia had always known what she wanted—and failed to find it. Perhaps, after all, a social equation in trousers had not been just what Cornelia craved. Perhaps, after all, Cornelia was seeking self-expression. At any rate, she lost no time in finding Gimbel, Brown and company, and was not the least aghast that this was the mighty multi-millionaire Gimbel who needed her services.
 
“Miss Holton, you say? Cornelia Holton, the daughter of my old friend, Dan Holton? Why bless your heart, have a seat! This is so sudden! When did you enter the business arena, pray?”
 
Cornelia was not abashed. With her usual straight-forward earnestness, she said, “Yes, I’m Cornelia Holton, and I’m in business to stay. If the arena is full of Bulls and Bears, I’m here to wrestle. What can I do for you, Mr. Gimbel?”
 
With a twinkle in his eye and a queer little smile, he pushed toward her the pile of snowy paper and began to dictate. North, South, East, and West the messages flew, and Cornelia’s fingers flew with them. White, slender, and shapely, they graced the machine as they had the piano, and, when lunch hour came, her face had flushed, and the little brown curls clung to her forehead with a slight moisture of effort. Cornelia was beautiful over her first conquest of the typewriter!
 
As she rose to go, she blushed, and stammered, “Mr. Gimbel, I’ll thank you not to tell my parents of this. They have no knowledge of my business enterprise and would be quite horrified. You know, nothing succeeds like success. I have been a failure long enough.” And she smiled as she left, the old grace of the distasteful ball-room clinging to her in spite of her steady resolve.
 
“Well, by jove!” exclaimed Mr. Gimbel. “By Jove!” he reiterated, “who’d a thought a Holton woman would go into business! Why, that girl’s mother was the greatest belle that this city ever produced. Well, she couldn’t get married, maybe.” So he too, went his way thinking of the little wife that had died years ago and of the great emptiness that had taken her place and that he had tried to fill with money.
 
Several months flew by. The Holton’s had their shock when Cornelia announced her business success, and were again in the normal path of life. The cat said, “I told you so! I knew she had the element of success in her!” The little dog barked, “Doggone her! I always knew I didn’t wag my tail for nothing.” The blue jay noisily called, “Aw, come on now and let’s finish our dispute. You can build a nest if I can, and you can hatch a family, too, if you try. Aw go awn!” But that was nothing to what the society world said when Cornelia Holton and James G. Gimble walked quietly to the study of the Reverend Devoted Divine and were made one, even to the millions and the famous homestead was also a palace of art and aesthetic refinement.
 
Mrs. Holton fainted over her coffee-cup when she unfolded the morning paper and beheld the head-lines, side-by-side with, and quite as large as the war news. Mr. Holton chuckled, as he emptied the water-bottle over her most expensive negligee. “I always said Cornelia had something up her sleeve.” “Well, the old girl must have warmed up at last,” added her brother.
 
The front door opened and in walked the disheveled sisters, screaming, “Mamma, mamma—Cornelia, the old maid—she has out-married us all!”

Zelda Sayre

________________________________________________________________________________________________
Footnotes
A prize-winning story, THE ICEBERG was published
in the 1918 Sidney Lanier High School Literary Journal.


One month after graduating from High School,
Zelda met Scott Fitzgerald.

The next GoFather/Fitzgerald page is  here.
________________________________________________________________________________________________

The 82nd Bullet: With And Without

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Knowledge with wisdom
yields intelligence.
Knowledge without wisdom
yields information.

________________________________________________________________________________________________

 Footnotes

THE 82nd BULLET  is the copyrighted property of  LCSoL.

Only the first 45 Bullets are linked together
because we do not want to make life easy
for our favorite thieves.
________________________________________________________________________________________________

Song About That Thing Which Runs Interference For Fear

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Doubt comes in 

and turns the wine

:::

Doubt comes in

and leaves a trace

of vinegar and turpentine

:::

Doubt comes in

and kills the lights

:::

Doubt comes in
with tricky fingers
:::

Doubt comes in
with fickle tongues
:::

Doubt comes in 

and my heart falters
and forgets the songs it sung
 

Where are you? 

Where are you now? 

Anais Mitchell

Lyrics for

Doubt Comes In

written by

Greg Brown  

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Mrs. CarPeo Gets Curious After Columbus Day Is Re-Named

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Will the city of

Columbus, Ohio

be renamed 

Indigenous Peoples, Ohio

???

________________________________________________________________________________________________

A Former Substitute Teacher Considers This MUST-POST-worthy

________________________________________________________________________________________________

npr.org

Please note:
This former substitute teacher
indelibly remembers the day
students threatened to chain him
to the teacher's desk because
they had thought it impossible
for someone to make
the Quadratic Formula
understandable

The next
GoFather/Trump
page is
here
but promises to be
devoid of my ego

Meanwhile,
President Trump
gets an
honorable mention
there 
  

________________________________________________________________________________________________

In 1977, Jules Feiffer Predicted Birth Of ... Urban Dictionary

________________________________________________________________________________________________

If you cannot eliminate the mother,

eliminate the mother tongue.

Jules Feiffer

Ackroyd

(1977)

Quote is from page 147
of this edition

More quotes
from this book are
here 

________________________________________________________________________________________________

How To Use A Term Of Endearment In New Jersey

________________________________________________________________________________________________

The debate is not whether 

Rex Tillerson called Donald Trump

a  Moron

The debate is whether

that word was preceded by
a profane adjective

However,

In New Jersey,

calling someone a

 f--king moron

is a term of endearment

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Footnotes

The punchline was spoken
by a guest on

the Stephanie Ruhle show

yesterday

The next
GoFather /Trump
page is
here  

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Ars Longa, Vita Brevis [HKu #46]

________________________________________________________________________________________________

The artist will die
but the art
—if it is good enough—
will not die

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Footnotes

 ARS LONGA, VITA BREVIS
[Art is Long, Life is Brief]
is the copyrighted property of LCSoL

The next GoFather Haiku page is
here

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Do Tell Me What To Don't

________________________________________________________________________________________________

If
you
do
tell
me
to
listen
to
these
Don't
songs
in
alphabetical
order...
I
will
say
Consider
it done 
  

________________________________________________________________________________________________
Footnote
If perchance your curiosity is aroused
by names such as YOUNG JESSIE,
then you might as well listen to
what the Beatles learned from
before recording  Yer Blues.
________________________________________________________________________________________________


 
  

Photoverio #272: Two Skinny Musicians

________________________________________________________________________________________________

© Oliverio 
Silhouetted with the Spotlight

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Onion News Week In Review Unveiled Cost-Cutting Measure

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Local Police Department Reduces Cost

By Using The Same Evidence

In Every Case

This cost-cutting
news report
originally
aired
in 2011

I have a yen
I have the blues
for the days when
FAKE NEWS
was nothing more than
FUNNY

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Footnotes
The italic verse was written by "Muddy Walters"

That name and that verse are
the copyrighted property of LCSoL

Vintage views of
ONION NEWS
Week in Review
are always good
to choose
despite pre-dating
all Trumpian anxieties
and the absence of
terminal punctuation
marks

However, there may be
a seemingly interminable
advert but this video
is worth the wait

If you're lucky,
the advert may be skipped
after seven seconds  
________________________________________________________________________________________________