Unprecedented Stop In Play During WORLD SERIES Game

_______________________________________________________________________________________________

Runner at 2nd base demanded back rub

from opposing player

_______________________________________________________________________________________________

The NEW NAME OF FACEBOOK Inspires A Precious Memory

________________________________________________________________________________________________

My cousin Richard

was always 

a topic of conversation

at an Oliverio Sunday 

family dinner

which never featured

less than a dozen diners

and three times as many

meatballs

 

Aunt Kay and Uncle Willie

were so proud that Richard

bypassed toilet training

at the age of three

 

He refuses to call it

Number 1 or Number 2

He says either "peep" or

 

At that precise moment,

Little Richard excused himself

from the dinner table

and spent five minutes

in the bathroom

but did not flush

 

Upon his return,

our Grandfather asked

What did you do?

 

Richard said

I did  Meta

 

Aunt Kay and three other Aunts

walked into the bathroom

and the toilet was full of

very large stools

 

The toilet was then flushed

and Richard had created

another Metaverse

•••

 

© PAUL OLIVERIO ©

________________________________________________________________________________________________

ANDY BOROWITZ Gets Another Exclusive !!!

________________________________________________________________________________________________

ººº

Read All About It

________________________________________________________________________________________________

I Can't Wait ... Another Poem By Mythter Hooda Helami

______________________________________________________________________________________________

I can't wait

to get my hands

on you

and

your hands 

on me

My hands 

on your skin

Your lips

on my face

Toes tickling the pillows

breasts nuzzling

my eyes

giving me

Divine Vision

We'll travel south

and 

our southern geography

will be the map

to happiness

with 

sudden stops

at the Sad Cafe

Their coffee

is mediocre

but the atmosphere

will be

our manifesto

•••

© PAUL OLIVERIO ©

Alter Ego #142857

______________________________________________________________________________________________

What The Marketing People Deleted From The First Amendment

______________________________________________________________________________________________

There are very few amongst us

who can quote verbatim

the entire  First Amendment

to the Constitution

of the United States

I am not one of them

But we all know

that it gives us

FREEDOM OF RELIGION

and 

FREEDOM OF SPEECH

et al

Those two pairs of three words

are emblazoned on the skull

of every American citizen

and non-citizen

The Institute of Inane Research 

has determined

that additional Freedoms

(or corollaries to those Freedoms)

were proposed in 1791

when James Madison

wrote

"The Bill of Rights"

 

We have

FREEDOM OF RELIGION

but it was suggested

that it be adjoined with

FREEDOM OF TOLERANCE

so as to avoid friction

between people

of different religions

 

We have 

FREEDOM OF SPEECH

but it was suggested 

that it be adjoined with

FREEDOM OF SILENCE

so as to avoid

too many people

speaking at the same time

 

The Silence

would give us time

to absorb

what has just been said 

 

The United States of America

was a mere teenager

when the Bill of Rights

was written

 

We were only fifteen years old

 

The Marketing Department

Founding Fathers

of the United States

did not want Madison

to include the adjoining Freedoms

because they compromised

FREEDOM OF RELIGION

and 

FREEDOM OF SPEECH

 

However.

imagine the corollary

FREEDOM OF TOLERANCE

!!!

It would mean that you

could go to your neighbor's church

even though it believed in things

dramatically different

from your own church

(and vice versa)

 

After their church service,

they would serve

a continental breakfast

including foods

you could never pronounce

but all you would say was

Yummy Yummy Yummy

Can I please have

a second serving

 

Imagine

the American classroom

if students practiced

FREEDOM OF SILENCE

whenever the teachers

were trying to teach them

 

Then and only then 

would our students

be as smart as

any other students 

 in any other country

 

  What a wonderful thing

those compromising Freedoms

would have been

If only there had been

—in 1791—

some Founding Mothers

in the United States

•••

©  PAULOLIVERIO ©

______________________________________________________________________________________________

Blow Out The Candles: Another Poem By Hooda Helami

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Blow out the candles

and breathe in the dark

 

Cloak yourself

with night

and the blackness

will feel

softer than flannel

 

Then welcome

the light of day

as you would welcome

a kid brother

•••

 

© PAUL OLIVERIO ©

Alter Ego #142857 

________________________________________________________________________________________________

MORT SAHL: One Of Political Comedy's Earliest Influencers

_______________________________________________________________________________________________

He died yesterday. He was

Quotably delicious with a bitter aftertaste

Rest in Peace, MORT SAHL

_______________________________________________________________________________________________

Photoverio #628: A Tree In Black And White ...

________________________________________________________________________________________________

With Clouds

© Oliverio

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Quoting CARSON McCULLERS On Love And Hate

________________________________________________________________________________________________

There are times when a man's greatest need
is to have someone to love,
some focal point for his diffused emotions.

Also there are times when the irritations,
disappointments, and fears of life,
restless as spermatozoids,
must be released in hate.

•••

REFLECTIONS IN A GOLDEN EYE

________________________________________________________________________________________________

The Day His Mouth Melted

________________________________________________________________________________________________

The day his mouth melted

they sent him to

the chocolate farm

Everyone saluted him

because

his soul wore epaulets

He just winked

Someone pointed to

the star on his chin

and said

This is where we begin

 

Two weeks later,

his mouth un-melted

and he was sent home

where no one 

looked at him

 

The epaulets were gone

but now

his soul wore blinders

 

This is where we end

•••

 

© PAUL OLIVERIO ©

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Sometimes, Justice Is A Court Jester

_______________________________________________________________________________________________

•••

_______________________________________________________________________________________________

The Real Power Of Hollywood

_______________________________________________________________________________________________

It happened last night                                              

Her name is Halyna Hutchins

_______________________________________________________________________________________________

 

The Real Mr. Piggy Is A Vegetable

_______________________________________________________________________________________________

•••

 _______________________________________________________________________________________________

Photoverio #627: Semi-Bleached And Speck-ful But Heartfelt

_______________________________________________________________________________________________

From 10536 to 90802

© Oliverio

_______________________________________________________________________________________________

Yet Another ANDY BOROWITZ Exclusive

________________________________________________________________________________________________

•••

El Chapo refuses

to have 

Steve Bannon

as a cellmate

Read All About It

________________________________________________________________________________________________

There Was A Goddess Amongst Us With A Deleteable Advert

________________________________________________________________________________________________

If Nina Simone

is not a Goddess,

then I don't want

religion

What Happened, Miss Simone

 _______________________________________________________________________________________________

Re-Routing Shakespeare #285714

_______________________________________________________________________________________________

Some people 

are born great

Some people

achieve greatness

Some other people

shine their shoes

All others get stepped on

•••

©  PAUL OLIVERIO  ©

 

 

The next page

in this series

is  here

_______________________________________________________________________________________________

A Mini-Series Called Impeachment And it's About TR _ _ P

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Of course,

I thought it was about

Trump

You probably think

the same thing

But that would be

wrong

 

It's about the trip switch

that gave us

the Lewinsky scandal

 

It's about T-R-I-P-P

as in Linda Tripp

 

And

it's produced by

Monica Lewinsky

 

The year was 1999

________________________________________________________________________________________________

What Was That?

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Did you say it

or was it me?

Maybe it was her

or the neighbor

with a mouth

bigger than Texas

Anyway

I know it isn't true

but then

I don't believe

a single word 

I say

 

What was that?

 

You don't believe it either?

 

But then

I don't believe

a single word

you say

 

I don't have to

believe anything

but I enjoy saying it

just the same

 

I enjoy hearing it

just the same

 

So would you please

repeat yourself

•••

 

© PAUL OLIVERIO © 

_______________________________________________________________________________________________

Song List #857124: What And Whats With Deleteable Advert

_______________________________________________________________________________________________

What's So Funny...

_______________________________________________________________________________________________

© Autobiography Of No One In Particular © ... Chapter Twenty

 _______________________________________________________________________________________________

Chapter 20

 

This is a bowl of farina

Mrs. CaPeo cooked it

this morning

by special request

 

It was delicious

and I am grateful

 

Today 

is the fiftieth anniversary

of the last meal

my mother 

cooked for me

 

It was a bowl of farina

and before the end 

of the day,

my Mother was dead

but your sympathy

is not what I want

 

For fifty years,

she has been a member

of the Oliverio 2.0 Society

 

A society

not lacking in membership

 

The newest member being

Vincent King, 

her son-in-law

 

I know in my heart

that a Big Party 

was held in her honor

 

It was a pleasure for me 

 to not be in attendance  

 

On October 16, 2021,

I celebrated 

my Fiftieth Birthday

as an Adult Orphan

 

Fifty 

is so much younger

than seventy-two

••• 

 

   

The next "chapter"

is  here

 

The first chapters

of this autobiography

are  there 

________________________________________________________________________________________________

The Third World Interpretation Of FREEDOM OF SPEECH

________________________________________________________________________________________________

You can say anything you want 

as long as it does not offend me

 

DAVID CHAPELLE

________________________________________________________________________________________________

I've Had Dreams About This New Yorker Magazine Cover

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Dated for HER Birthday

Artist =  LUCI GUTIERREZ

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Bleached Window Decor From 2200 Block of 4th Street (90802)

______________________________________________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________________________________________

G.O.D. Will Not Be There For The Last Judgment

______________________________________________________________________________________________

G.O.D.

no longer believes in

the Last Judgment of people

for the simple reason that

those "people"

have become obsessed

with standing in judgment

of other people

A Last Judgment

would be either

a redundancy

or a coin toss

•••

© PAUL OLIVERIO ©

______________________________________________________________________________________________

Footnote

This page was inspired by

Julian Barnes

______________________________________________________________________________________________

Quoting The Author Of NOTHING TO BE FRIGHTENED OF

______________________________________________________________________________________________

Fiction is made by a process

which combines total freedom

and utter control,

 

which balances precise observation

with the free play of the imagination,

 

which uses the lie to tell the truth

and truth to tell lies.

•••

 

JULIAN BARNES

______________________________________________________________________________________________

Why I Will Never Dance On My Grave ... With Deleteable Advert

_______________________________________________________________________________________________

I will never dance

on my grave

because

I am too busy dancing

as far away from it

as possible

But when I am buried

I will dance in my grave

If you don't believe me,

dig up my grave

and as soon as

the coffin is kissed,

it will open with me

dancing to

Chubby Checker's

twist

•••

 

© PAUL OLIVERIO ©

 

_______________________________________________________________________________________________

Footnote

This page was inspired by

Julian Barnes

_______________________________________________________________________________________________

To Make A Quatrain ... Number Fifty-Two

 _______________________________________________________________________________________________

 

To make a quatrain about  

avoiding damnation

 

Knowledge without wisdom

is merely information

 

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Footnotes

TO MAKE A QUATRAIN
...

is the copyrighted property

of LCSoL

Some italic couplets
were originally written
in the 20th Century
and copyrighted
under the title
The Neither/Nor Journal

The next page
in this series
is  here

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Birthday Girl Is Looking Good At Seventy-Five

_______________________________________________________________________________________________

Born October 11, 1946

_______________________________________________________________________________________________

Flaubert Quote From NOTHING TO BE FRIGHTENED OF

_______________________________________________________________________________________________

Contradiction

is the thing that keeps

sanity in place

•••

GUSTAVE FLAUBERT

My mask de jeuer

_______________________________________________________________________________________________

The Fiftieth Page In This Series ... The Maybe Birds

 _______________________________________________________________________________________________

Maybe

We can't go on

meeting like this

© Oliverio

***

The next page 
in this series
is  here 

_______________________________________________________________________________________________

A Never-Before-Seen Gilmore Girls Photograph

________________________________________________________________________________________________

 

Gilmore Girlaholics will recognize 

most of this image as it appeared

in an episode entitled

Midnight At The Oasis

 

But Lorelai's date

—being greeted at the door—

gets a backstage view

of the image

 

"The most handsome man"

Lorelai had ever dated

was also the most boring

and he was blessed with

an elephantine ego

 

This Season Three episode 

originally aired in 2002

 

Lorelai's date

is portrayed by Jon Hamm

who is also seen observing

the scene

 

According to

the Institute of Inane Research,

the actor was totally disgusted

with his portrayal as

"the handsome guy"

I need to play a character

who is all mystery and mastery

like a Mafia DON

or a one-legged

window DRAPER.

 

I feel like such a wienie

always getting cast as

"the handsome guy"

but I don't want to be

a whiner

because it pays the bills

:::

The next thing you know

—between the wienie

and the whiner—

a Weiner named Matthew

contacts the Hamm

named Jon

and Matthew says

I want to cast you

as a most brilliant and 

villainous advertising man

That's a mad idea,

replies Jon

Terrific,

exclaims Matthew,

We'll call it 

Mad Men

 •••

 

Mad Men 

premiered on

July 19, 2007

 

The rest is history

 

________________________________________________________________________________________________

 

Two Football Legends On A Baseball Diamond

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Jerry Rice  and  Steve Young

of the San Francisco 49ers

on the pitcher's mound

in San Francisco

at Game 1

of the

Giants-Dodgers'

baseball play-off series

BILL PLASCHKE

________________________________________________________________________________________________

A Chewable Quote Dedicated To LIL GREEN

_______________________________________________________________________________________________

∞ ∞

Music is

the best means

we have

of digesting 

time

•••

 

W. H. AUDEN

_______________________________________________________________________________________________