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There was an outbreak
that reached
epidemic proportions
wherever there were
husbands and wives
with small
children
Marital Spats
were violent and dangerous
to entire families
These spats
only occurred
during the dinner hour
To avoid hospitalizations,
husbands and wives
were inoculated
or wore masking tape
over their mouths
The latter was most amusing,
to their offspring
One year later,
MS
was severely on the wane
and family fun
reached an all-time high
But then there was
a second wave
of
Marital Spats
More masking tape
and more inoculations
Though nobody really knew
what was being inoculated
Six months later,
the second wave
was reduced
almost to naught:
Sunday afternoons,
miniature golf
became more popular
than alcohol
However,
there was a third wave
of MS
but it seemed to be
of a much less degree:
Instead of violent,
invidious language
hurled between
husbands and wives,
a maximum
of two tea spoons
of mashed potatoes
was hurled across
the dinner table
No spoon limit was applied
to children present
at the spat
but they much preferred
to hurl peas
and string beans
Since the third wave of MS
resulted in much less
masking tape
and very few inoculations,
most people
thought that
there was no more
disease of
marital spatting
Meanwhile,
the Inoculato family
became the wealthiest
people on earth
But the smartest people
on earth
were the husbands and wives
who refused to believe
their lives were cured
of MS
These people
[and their entire families]
knew that to spat
was unavoidable
These smart people [SP]
acquired Acceptance
This product is readily available
wherever human beings
can be found
The SPs
accepted the spatiness
as momentary stains
on an otherwise
meaningful
and lasting
relationship
Resultingly,
The Inoculato family
did not get any richer
as far as these people
were concerned
They didn't have to
Meanwhile,
the Anxieto Corporation
invested millions of dollars
to develop new fears
to collectively plant
in everybody's head.
So, keep tuned
for further developments
Post Script
When the Inoculatos
would invite the SPs
to their estate,
the guests would invariably
defeat their hosts
at backgammon,
badminton and Monopoly
But rarely at tennis
:::
© PAUL OLIVERIO ©
This page is somewhat
under construction
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I hate to call you brilliant, Mr. SmartAss
ReplyDeletebut no other word will do
Flattery will get you somewhere
Deleteand if that somewhere is Long Beach,
I'll treat you to a Starbucks
breakfast wrap
I'm not sure my husband would approve of that.
DeleteBring him along.
DeleteWe'll let him pay