A Faded But Readable Ten PAC From Roz Chast ...

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10 Passive/Aggressive Commandments

©©©©©     ROZ CHAST     ©©©©©

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The Story Of My Life ... Was Not To Be ... Was Not To Bee

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The red word was invalid according to

the editor of the extremely addictive

"game" from the New York Times

 

Otherwise, I could have been a Genius

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The DON McLEAN Song About February 3, 1959

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It Happened In Clear Lake, Iowa

AMERICAN PIE  (with deleteable advert)

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TCM Hosts

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Left to Right

Stewart**Karger**Malone**Muller**Mankewiecz

Spend a few hours with TCM

(Turner Classic Movies)

and listen carefully

to what the hosts say

before and after

whatever film

they present

because their collective

Hollywood IQ

is approximately

one thousand

*

Watch the film

with the words

of the hosts

floating above your eyes

and 

 

Presto

!!!

 

You will feel

your IQ

increase by

ten or twenty points 

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*Smokey Robinson, **The Rolling Stones, And ***Moi

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*

If you can want

you can need

 

**

You can't always get

what you want

but if you try

sometimes

you get what you need

***

If you want to make friends,

say what they WANT to hear

If you want to be avoided 

—but respected—

say what they NEED to hear

 

With Deleteable Adverts

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Photoverio #726: The Silhouette Church

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© Paul Oliverio

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From The Land Of Immobilia

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The King and Queen

of Immobilia

sat on their throne

and did not move

unless nature called

or their stomach grumbled

or

—of course—

the cats needed

to be fed

They traveled the world

—on-line or off-subject—

but in reality

they went nowhere

 

But not always

 

In pursuit of their 

professions

(art + math)

they circumnavigated

the earth

[in equivalence]

 with or without rhyme

Immobility

was  their chosen facade

and could suck up sympathy

from a salamander

or sarcasm from the gutter

***

 

© PAUL OLIVERIO ©

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Mama MacBook In A Nina Simone Seascape

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Password = ***323***

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Heavy Metal Lanscape Art In Downtown Long Beach

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Artist Unknown

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Named For A Jimi Hendrix Song ... With Deleteable Advert

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*

Purple Haze

© Photoverio #725.5

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The Intimacy Of Long Beach Architecture ... 1928 And 2021

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Color Scheme ... Another Hooda Helami Poem

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Before and after

the laughter,

there was the color Green

who said to me

"This is my friend, Yellow,

we are very close."

I laughed again

then

the color Red

jumped inside my head

but nothing was said.

How sad

how mad

but 

how glad I was

to be sitting at

this table.

***

©  HOODA HELAMI  ©

Alter Ego #142857

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Photoverio #725: Once Upon A Spectral Time

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Howl-O-Ween Parade

(2017)

© Oliverio

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Photoverio #724: The Buddha Tree

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© Oliverio

  _______________________________________________________________________________________________

 

Angelic Entertainment (Comic Relief #4615)

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GARY LARSON

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To Bee Or Not To Bee ... The Amazing Mr. ME

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Only the  Genius

or the  Queen Bee

score higher

Thirty games played = Thirty Amazing scores

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The 173nd Bullet: Right And Wrong

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The smart idea

presented poorly

yields to 

the dumb idea

presented

with a smile.

  

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Footnote

THE 173rd BULLET

is the copyrighted property

of LCSoL

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Once Upon A Time ... In The Deep South

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Ball Park Integration

Immortalized

 

Read All About It

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He Said/She Said ... Hard + Soft

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All that is soft

came from Grace

Wisdom

(and its' hard edges)

came from Sam

 

Of course,

Grace and Sam

are best known

as 

my Mother and Father

Dime-a-dozen

are the moments

with Sam

and his wisdomic,

terse, funny ways

 

Inspiring the thought:

 

Wisdom is gender-based

 

Explaining why

I am sometimes

hard-pressed

to remember

any wisdom

expressed by

the woman who birthed me

 ***

 

BUT

[to the nth degree]

the most important words of wisdom

conveyed from parent

to this offspring

came from 

my widowed mother

in 1971

 

We were walking

two blocks

from home

to this beach:

 

Grace said to Paul

 

Your sins are so loud

and so obvious,

other people 

will forget

they have ever sinned

 

***

© PAUL OLIVERIO ©

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Starbucks TV

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*****

© Oliverio

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FANCY FEAST Trattoria On The Island Of Manhattan

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Read All About It

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Play Ball

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Mommy Redhead

Daddy Longlegs

and Baby Billy

went to a ball game

Someone hit

a grand slam

 

You could hear

almost everyone cheer

 

Ten people

spilled their beer

Baby Billy

pointed to a bird

Someone stole third

 

The rally monkey

danced the bugaloo

 

Mommy Redhead

headed for the loo

 

Daddy Longlegs

danced with a kazoo

 

The home team won

10-2

 

The game ended

with a prayer

led by Someone

—the Most Valuable Player—

 

Everyone went home happy

(Almost everyone)

Baby Billy had

a mustard stain

on his bib

***

©  PAUL OLIVERIO  ©

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Her Professor, Her Pastor, The Guest Lecturer ... Or Man At Bar

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It's not what you say,

it's your package

***

©   MY BETTER HALF   ©

 

 

Translation:

She is not really listening

to anything being said.

All she is thinking about 

is what's inside

his jockey shorts. 

 

Better Half = Mrs. CarPeo 

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Pluck Myself With Creamy + Deleteable Advert

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I can pluck apples

from your

peach tree

Dance on your ceiling,

your wife

or your knee

Laugh like Louisiana

in the middle

of Maine

Fill the sky

with stars

in the pouring

rain

Tear you with jeers

or bore you

to tears

Fondle your fears

with a midnight

house call

or 

ask you 

to play

flag football

BUT

I'd rather

give you 

my love

than do

all 

of the above

I'm a man 

not a menace

Anyone for 

tennis?

***

© PAUL OLIVERIO ©

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Spectacular Events That NEVER Changed History ... Chapter One

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While walking in an alley,

I farted forty times

within forty steps

but no one heard a sound

because the rest of the world

was deep asleep.

***

 

HOODA THUNKIT

© Alter Ego # 285714 ©

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Better Than You Think [Haiku #82]

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  Seek and you shall find

not always

what you sought

but something

much better 


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Footnotes

BETTER THAN YOU THINK

is the copyrighted property
of LCSoL


My haikus
are no longer linked together
because we do not
want to make life
too easy for our favorite thieves

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A Quote In Lieu Of Two Lines From His Triangle

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The heart has reasons

that reason cannot know

***

BLAISE PASCAL

 

***   © Oliverio ©  ***

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Eye Of The Tigris (Comic Relief #4602)

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© GARY LARSON ©

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Rorschach Celebration For A Grey Day

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In Black And Blue

With Deleteable Advert

***  © Oliverio ©  ***

 

 

The next Rorschach page is  here

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I'm Just Answering A Question

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I think the only differences between 

Apple Computers and the Italian Mafia

is how they define "hardware."

And the profit margins of the former

dwarf those of the latter.  

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A Psychedelic Transformation Of The Previous Page

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Willie Mays      +    Duke Snider [Stats]  

© Oliverio

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Willie And The Duke + Manhattan Skyline

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Willie Mays and Duke Snider

© Oliverio ©   see comment below

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The Fifty-Second Page In This Series ... Contrarians

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We can't go on

We can go on

meeting like this

© Oliverio

***

The next page 
in this series
is  here

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Betwixt and Between ... Florally Speaking

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Un-cropped and improved,

this image is en route

to YelpLand

©      Oliverio      ©  

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Easier To Love Him Than To Read His Mind

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With Deleteable Advert

SHAWN MULLINS

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Photoverio #723: Above The Beach

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Cliff Notes

© Oliverio

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Simple Bloody Truth About A British Existentialist

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I'm me

and nobody else

and whatever people

think I am

or say I am,

that's what I'm not

because

they don't know 

a bloody thing 

about me.

***

ALAN SILLITOE

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Photoverio #722: Keep On Dancing

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The Sisters Of Sappho

© Oliverio

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Woodn't YOU Kiss Me? Sic Sic Sic

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💋

© Photoverio #622.5

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Today And Tomorrow ... Hooda Helami Strikes Again

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Some days,

I have something 

important to say

Some days,

I want everyone 

to go away

(myself included)

with all thought denuded

 

I count up my sorrow

and yearn for

tomorrow

 

When

—I hope—

I'll have something

to say

***

 

©  HOODA HELAMI  ©

Alter Ego #142857

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I Needed To Talk To Harold

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I needed to talk to Harold

about a very personal issue

                                           For a week,

                                           I sought in vain

                                           with pain

                                           hammering in my heart

Finally, I found him

on a very wet Saturday afternoon

                                          He was juggling his eyes

                                          in a strip joint.

                                          I had my MacBook

                                          to record his every word

 

He had Yolanda give him

a lap dance

                                         I had a laptop dance.

                                         Harold said everything

                                         I needed to hear

 

I was very satisfied

and both of us

gave Yolanda

$50

___

 

© PAUL OLIVERIO ©                                           ________________________________________________________________________________________________

 

Chalk Talk (Comic Relief #4588)

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GARY LARSON

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The Translation Of ZHANG ZIPIAO = Self-Portrait

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*

ZHANG ZIPIAO

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Profound Moments Of Silence In The Sports World ... This Week

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 BILL RUSSELL

b.  February 12, 1934                   d.  July 31,2022

VIN SCULLY

b.  November 29, 1927                 d.  August 2, 2022

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